A little bit of worry and a lot of work -- by Linnea

How many of you out there have ever driven for 24 hours over the course of two days with four teenagers with fast metabolisms? Not me! Oh, and I forgot the whole gluten free thing. How could I? Being me, I like planning and I thought this would be great fun.

Well.

So, great fun. Yeah, I think I am going to have permanent lines on my forehead from this week. Thank you, Mom, for all the trips we've been on. It is a lot of work. This week, I have learned to not leave things to the last minute and to get as much stuff done ahead of time as possible. I think it was a good idea to have a restaurant meal tonight, since even getting dinner on the table last night was a challenge.

Also, if you ask, your siblings will help you.. Sometimes.

Shopping for vacation

The big trip to the grocery store to get ready for vacation was a bit of a stressful time for Linnea. She had a list and a budget, but she doesn't yet have a sense of how much things cost so she wasn't prepared for the prices of some items. She is planning on dinner out the night before we leave, and has set aside money for that as well. There were also complaints from the siblings today about a lack of lunch food and she felt bad about leaving them in the lurch.

Suddenly, her shopping needs got greater than her budget, and when I added a few items to the cart, Linnea started her muttering.

"I won't have enough money."
"Maybe I shouldn't buy so much food."
"What if people are hungry?"
"People are hungry, I need to give them more for lunch."
"I won't have enough money."
"Canola oil?? Why am I buying oil??"
"Ooohh! 2 for $6, it's a chip deal!"
"I'm not going to have enough money for dinner tomorrow."
"Mom, will you front me money if I need it?"

I went to three stores with her, and I am exhausted!

One new skill came out of this ordeal. When we finished at Cub Foods and were bagging the groceries, Linnea suddenly realized she had forgotten to give the cashier her one coupon for $1 off Chex cereal. Not surprisingly, she had a small freak out! It turns out that if you take your receipt and your forgotten coupons to customer service -- conveniently located on the way out the door -- the customer service guy will give you cash back for your coupons right there. Who knew?

It doesn't seem like a dollar would be a big deal, but every dollar counts when you are on a budget. Between that dollar and the money I gave her for the things I needed, she is all set for dinner tomorrow. Which is a relief to me, I must say. I really don't want to add cleaning up from dinner to the list of things to do before we leave!

When Costco lets you down (or saves the family from a sugar rush?)

Linnea is getting to working on acquiring her food for our trip, which will involve one breakfast, two lunches and one dinner on the road, as well as snacks in the car. She is making banana and pumpkin breads for breakfast the first day, and is very relieved that breakfast is included at the hotel on the second day of driving, as we have previous experience with breakfast food not keeping well in the car. Her lunches are sandwiches with lunch meat and cheese, and chicken salad for dinner. Add in some fruit, chips and brownies and we will be all set.

She is a big believer in having plenty of snack food to eat in the car, and doesn't want anyone to be denied their favorite snack option. The initial snack list was a little on the long side and included Reese's Peanut Butter cups, Hershey Kisses, Skittles, Swedish Fish,, Acai berries, Rice Krispie treats, Chex Muddy Buddies, veggies, fruit, pretzels and crackers and cheese.

Wow. I think I have a sugar rush just writing that!

Being Linnea, she wants to by large bags of all these things, then split them up into serving sizes to pass out for snacks, both to keep portions under control and because she just likes organizing. Thus the trip to Costco.

I don't go to Costco often, mostly for baking supplies, beans, peanut butter and toilet paper. It is not exactly conveniently located and there are many, many things I have no interest in buying. I certainly don't go in the middle of the afternoon when it is crowded, or bring all of my children. Lots of people, giant carts being driven by 10 year olds who aren't paying attention, and all four of my children talking at once. Not my idea of a good time.

I went today. Linnea needed to go, and asking her to wait for a better time means that she will obsess over when we go until it is just easier to get it done. So, off we went, and Costco let her down.

She must have thought that Costco just has giant bags of everything you want on exactly the day you want them. It doesn't. Giant bags of Acai berries? Check. Giant bags of every kind of candy known to man? Not so much. Big boxes of Chex cereals? That would be no. Gluten free Rice Krispies? Also no.

We left there with fruit snacks and popcorn, neither of which were on her original list, and a very worried Linnea wondering how many other stores she will need to shop at and how she will ever satisfy her snack eating customers. I, on the other hand, could not be happier about eliminating so much sugar from a 24 hour car ride.

What kind of candy does Costco have in a large bag? M&Ms, of course. Which we did buy, but weren't on the list.

Wait, M&Ms weren't on the list? What?

Linnea's Charlie Brown Life

Since she was little, Linnea has often seemed like the Charlie Brown of our family. If the kids got four equal toys, hers would break first; her sisters have always had beautiful long hair, hers has never grown easily; she got glasses at age one, the others have perfect vision. It would make sense, then, that in our little project, if there was to be a week that was more complicated, she would get it.

And she has.

We are headed out of town for vacation on Friday. Initially, Linnea was excited about it being her week, "Great! I get to plan all the snacks and food for the trip!" She had it all laid out, how much money to spend on trip food, how much to buy for the four days at home, and even an allotment for takeout the night before we leave. She also thought through making sure the fridge is empty of perishables by Friday. It all seemed so easy.

Now, Monday, the first day of the week has arrived. Suddenly, not so easy.

Yesterday, I started hearing worry noises. "I don't want to spend too much tomorrow." "What do I really need to get?" "This is going to be really hard." And then today . . . "I shouldn't have gotten those snacks, I used too much money." "I didn't get what Tim likes, he's going to be hungry." "Oh, I forgot to get salad stuff for Mom."

In the car on the way to the store (again), she kept telling me how much she has to do, and how worried she is that people will go hungry in our 24 hours in the car. I think she is actually planning to overfeed us! I am going to help her by sitting down tomorrow morning with her to make a very specific list of what she is responsible for, when to make things and what to buy. On the one hand, it seems unfair that she gets this week, on the other, I'm not sure any of the other three are organized enough to pull it off.

I am going to keep thinking of this week as a unique opportunity for Linnea to use her mad skills, and not as another Charlie Brown moment. I'm also going to make sure her little duck legs don't go too crazy, paddling under the surface.

Dear Blog, with love from Caroline

Dear Blog,

                So Mom told me to write about this process and what I learned. I don’t really know what to write about.

                The process is fine except for the part where people eat the food I buy and then want me to buy more. And the part where I have to actually cook. I learned that I don’t much like cooking. We come to a dilemma when one considers how much I like eating. The actual budgeting and lists and stores and stuff were fine. That was easy. But I just don’t like making food into something  we can eat.

               Another piece that made me more empathetic toward Mom was how ungrateful people are. They don’t appreciate that I made an effort to purchase and prepare the food. And they’ve all done this, too, so I thought maybe they’d be a little more appreciative this time around. It didn’t make me want to continue making the effort. I will certainly be more grateful now that I know how hard it is. From now on, I resolve to avoid the kitchen at all costs unless I’m baking brownies for my teammates.

                                               Thanks for listening to my rant!

                                                                Caroline, survivor of the Crazy Grocery Thing

What's for dinner?

This afternoon, Caroline had an extensive conversation (mostly with herself!) about what to have for dinner.

Mom: "It looks like pancakes are on the menu, can we talk that through a little?"
Caroline: "What do you mean?"
Mom: "Well, not everyone will be here, so how big a batch should you make? And we have bacon, but sausage is a lot more substantial, have you thought about serving that? And are we having anything else? Maybe fruit?"
Caroline: "Oh, okay. I don't know. Do I want to make pancakes? I'm not sure I want to. And I definitely don't want to make chicken salad, that's too much work. What are we going to have?"
Mom: "I don't know. You are in charge."
Caroline: "Oh, dear, what should we have? I don't know."

pause

Caroline: "We can have nachos! That's what I'll make!"
Mom: "Sounds good."

pause

Caroline (crestfallen): "But we don't have any ground beef."
Mom: "You didn't buy the ground beef this morning?"
Caroline: "Mom, we were running late, and I had to be somewhere at 9:30!" (They walked in the door at 9:10, the store is on the way home, and the babysitting job is around the corner, but I digress.)
Mom: "We can go get ground beef."
Caroline: "No. Yes. No. I don't know."

pause

Caroline (beaming): "I will use the chicken for the chicken salad and we will have chicken nachos!"
Mom: "Sounds like a great solution."
Caroline: "Uh, how do I cook the chicken?"

Later . . .

Mom: "So, now are you just switching up the meals? Pancakes another night? You can buy more chicken."
Caroline: "Nope. I'm going to be like Tim.
Mom: "As in?"
Caroline: "You say, 'Hey, Tim, what's for dinner? And he says, 'No idea.' and you say, 'Tim! It's 5:00!!'"

Great.

Um, how do you order pizza?

Who knew? Apparently it's a skill that needs to be mastered. As promised, Caroline chose to order pizza for dinner.

Caroline: "Mom? When do we order the pizza?"
Mom: "Ask your father, I'm not helping you order gluten pizza!"
Caroline: "Dad? How do I order the pizza?"
Dad: "Do you have the number?"
Caroline: "Noooooooo!"
Dad: "Well, you need the number."
Caroline: "Do you have it?"

Naturally, he does, although we never order pizza, so I am not clear on why.

Caroline(dialing): "Mom? What do I say?"
Mom: "Hi, I'd like to order pizza for pickup."
Caroline(nervously): "Hi? I'd like to order pizza for pickup?"

Caroline: "Ummm, one cheese and one with sausage?"

Caroline: "Ummm, Caroline?

Caroline: "Okay. Bye?"

Caroline: "Whew."

My favorite part was when she had to think about her own name . . .

Cooking with Kids

Well.

Caroline is a baker, and not a cook. I did not know this.

Actually, I knew she was a baker (Best Cookies award on the cross country team four years in a row!) and I know that baking and cooking do not always go together, but her cooking challenges have surprised me. Equally surprising is that Tim, who spends as little time in the kitchen as possible, is able to plan out how to make a meal and do prep ahead of time, while also asking intelligent questions of his parental assistants.

Yesterday, we discovered that Caroline can't melt butter and grate cheese at the same time. She also doesn't know how to ask for help in such a way that people are very willing -- she kept asking someone to grate the cheese while she herself was sitting in a chair in the living room. Needless to say, no one was very enthusiastic!

And today, this . . .

Mom: "For your risotto, you will need chopped onions and mushrooms, grated Parmesan, chicken broth and rice."

Caroline: "Okay."
Mom: "Is there anything you think you should do first, before you start cooking?"

Caroline: "Measure the rice?"

Mom: "Okay . . . anything else?"

Caroline: "I don't know!!" 

Really? Can't think of anything? Anything at all? Measuring the rice is certainly a key step, but maybe she could do a few more things before standing over the pan, stirring the risotto. Maybe. Not sure where the sense of panic comes from, but she does seem challenged by multitasking. And the grater.

Tomorrow, she is ordering pizza.

Caroline and Week Two

Based on the panic attacks and stress of the first time around, I am guessing that Caroline might not be that excited about her second week of responsibilities. I asked her about her plans over the weekend, and got "Nope, no plans" as her response. Then this morning, I suggested she might want to make a list before going to the store. "Why do I have to make a list? Tim doesn't make a list!!" Yeah, and that works out so well.

In the car on the way home from the store, Caroline was very annoyed with the process of grocery shopping:

"We were in line for 15 minutes! We got behind these people who couldn't decide if they wanted to buy everything they picked out."

"Why do they have 15 checkout lines if they are only going to open 2?"

"There was this couple shopping, totally disgusting PDA all over the store. Gross!"

That was my favorite, actually. Andrew and I have never been able to understand couples wandering through the grocery store with their arms around each other. If we tried that, I am sure one of us would get run over by the cart! I suppose it is a cheap date . . .

Anyway, Caroline is cooking pasta with shrimp and Alfredo for dinner and does have a menu plan for the rest of the week. She has carefully labeled her snack bags, and Tim is already complaining that, you guessed it, "she isn't buying any chips I like!"

Ahhh, sweet revenge!

Deep Thoughts from Tim

          I find this entire project to be an interesting experience that is really good at upsetting people in various ways.  I appreciate the idea and have even enjoyed myself at some points however there are many cases of angry children.  While most of my frustrations were due to exhaustion and the fact that I simply didn’t want to go to the store anymore, other siblings problems included one who “quit” and another who was continually messed with for not providing a side dish.

          Of course it is easy to harsh on a project which you didn’t sign up for and then couldn’t opt out of, but all in all it has been fine.  In some ways it is pretty fun to be in control, even if it brings out the mocking tendencies in your family.  It’s been a nice experience, but I am glad to be the first one done after this Sunday is past us.  I’m sure most of you have had a few laughs at my expense, but that is okay because I have had a few as well.  It’s good stuff I’d say. 

In which Tim learns another lesson

The initial idea was that in the first week, the child in charge would plan the dinners, budget and shop, and assist in the cooking but only be fully responsible for preparing one dinner. In the second week, all dinner preparation was to be facilitated by the shopper, with assistance from others if requested.

Unfortunately, Tim's second week fell during MLB All Star Weekend and he had been given tickets to attend all the events as his 16th birthday gift. That meant he missed dinners on Monday and Tuesday and wasn't here to cook anything. Being as I am not an ogre, I simply took the plan he laid out and we cooked without him. I contemplated having him use the crock pot, but that seems like a winter comfort food tool that lacks appeal in mid-July.

We were out for dinner on Wednesday as well, at a work function for Andrew, so tonight was the first evening where Tim had to cook dinner himself. The menu was straightforward, beef and bean nachos; easy to prepare and a favorite of everyone -- probably why he put it on the menu.

All the ingredients were procured, instructions given for the recipe, and the time determined to serve the meal. Time headed off to the kitchen with plenty of time to prepare dinner.

And then . . . Tim returned to the living room, looking pathetic . . .

Mom: "What's the matter?"
Tim: "How am I supposed to cook in there?"
Mom: "Because . . ."
Tim: " It's a mess!"
Mom: "Right. You guys don't clean up."
Tim: "But I can't cook in a mess!"
Mom: "I feel like this is something I say every night!"

Remember how the job of feeding the family is overwhelming, annoying and time consuming? Here is yet another reason! Our kitchen is small (fabulously remodeled last year, but still small) and this year, I have not assigned dish duty to one child per week as I have done in past summers. So, if no one is responsible, then no one is responsible. I have been observing how they don't put dishes in the dishwasher or throw away trash. Now, suddenly, Tim is noticing that part of being able to provide a meal is having a clean space in which to prepare it.

I don't know what will happen now. Will he do better himself throughout the day? Will he nag his sisters? Will he help them out with kitchen clean up when it is their turn? I know that if my kitchen were pristine every night when it was time to cook, it would make the job ever so much easier. Tim seems to be learning that quickly as well.

Nagging hasn't worked for me so far, but maybe he should give it a try.

New (and Improved?) Ground Rules

Now, if only they will follow the new rules. Which do involve vegetables and more cooking. And kindness. And lunch.

1) I need salad. You may not like it, and you don't have to eat it, but I need salad. And you should learn to like it, it's good for you.

2) Vegetables. Serve them. The garden is now producing beans, kale and spinach. Use them in good health!

3) Drink milk. Crystal Light is not a nourishing, muscle-building recovery food.

4) Lunch is an actual meal, for which we need actual food. Turkey and roast beef are great, but they go better with bread.

5) Cook. Bake.

6) Please do not buy as many snacks. I appreciate a good deal as much as the next person, but chips, pretzels and M&Ms fall into the same category as Crystal Light. Plus (and now I get to be selfish), if chips are here, I will eat them. I don't want to eat them. Or, I don't want to want to eat them. Or something like that. Although, if all the chip bags are labeled "Tomorrow," I am probably safe.

7) Each child will write a guest entry at the end of the week he/she shops. Your fans want to hear from you. And a little academic effort over the summer won't go to waste.

8) Have a good attitude, both when it is your turn and when it isn't. We are almost done, you can do this!

It's Tim Time Again!

Here we go! After a chat yesterday morning, Tim headed off to the store with Linnea, where he spent a little more than last time ($109) and came home with a few higher quality calories. He skipped the chip deal and bought carrots, bananas, salad greens and garlic. He even left all the donuts in the bakery case! There was a plan for lunch (chicken nachos) and turkey for sandwiches tomorrow.

Looking good so far, but . . .

Mom: "What is your plan for dinner?"
Tim: "Yeah, I'm not going to be here, so you can choose."
Mom: "From what?"
Tim: "Well, I got some chicken. Or you can have pasta."
Mom: "That's the plan?"
Tim: "Yeah. And I'm not going to be here tomorrow, so then you can have the other one."
Mom: "Did you get potatoes?"
Tim: "Nope, forgot those."
Mom: "Seriously?"
Tim: "Yeah. Sorry about that."

The best part about the beginning of Tim's week are the "Bags of paradox" that Andrew wrote about last night. It turns out that, while he respects the Sharpie labels on the snacks, Tim thinks they are a bit ridiculous. He decided to label things "tomorrow" and "not today" just to annoy his sisters. It's working. And the bags are still closed.

I really want some M&Ms . . .

Bags of paradox (Guest post by Andrew)

As usual I was a bit hungry after getting home from work on Monday, especially since I rode my bike through a rain squall.  During this food experiment, our weekly coordinators write on bags of snacks with a sharpie.  We all respect the WEDNESDAY potato chips, the SATURDAY tortilla chips, and so on.  

Anyway, I looked around the kitchen and saw some Tostitos, picked them up and saw TOMORROW written on them.  I thought about it for a second and then found it funny, thinking, “Wow. If you take it literally, this bag can never be opened.”  I reported this to Anneke and said, “I’ve got my topic for my guest entry.  The TOMORROW bag that can never be opened.”  

I went back to the kitchen and spied a big bag of M and M’s on the second shelf.  It wasn’t open.  Darn.  I took it down and looked at it, and sure enough, it had NOT TODAY written on it.

We're halfway there!

Several people, including the children, think that perhaps one week each of grocery shopping is enough of an opportunity to learn some valuable lessons. I'll admit, I'm pretty tired of the project at this point, but am looking forward to some renewed energy (and some updated ground rules) as we start the cycle again. They will all be taking another turn, because I really do believe they need to make changes to their own systems while they can still remember the first time around.

So, what have I learned so far?

I've learned that grocery shopping and planning is overwhelming, annoying and time consuming no matter who is doing it. That just demonstrating the process week after week to the children is not enough to give them the skills they need to hit the ground running themselves. And that, given opportunity and guidance, teens can take on a large project and be successful, even if the measure of that success is different for each of them.

Each one of them has taken on the project willingly and stuck with it all week -- Caroline's brief desire to quit notwithstanding. While there was a range of success with the planning and the level of balance with each meal, they did make a plan and kept slogging through the daily grind. I do think they could all have been kinder to each other when the larder was not as full of choices as they wanted, but hopefully that is an area that will improve the second time through.

There are some days I think starting this project was craziness, and other days it seems like a stroke of brilliance. Today feels pretty good, but we'll have to see what tomorrow brings -- you never know what Tim's grocery cart will look like!

From 6 to 4, it's harder than you think

Yesterday, we thought having some people at camp would make the shopping and meal planning easier, fewer people means less work, right? Well, not exactly.

We eat dinner together as a family every night. The timing is often fluid to make sure we are together; I once asked a babysitting client if we could move the regular weekly job to 5:30 from 5:00 so we could eat first (the mother said yes). One of the reasons I came up with this plan was because it is a never ending job to plan and prepare dinner for six people every single night, and I wanted some help and ownership from the rest of the family. Clearly, the kids have gotten the message about what a tough job it is, now we just have to work on techniques to do it well.

So, back to Sabine's plan. I don't know if it is my fault, or if she is not as skilled a planner as one might want, but it has been quite a struggle today to plan dinner for only a portion of a family. As we look ahead to tomorrow and Sunday, the two girls will still be at camp and Tim will be spending much of his time at the MLB All Star events in Minneapolis. I just can't bring myself to get excited about dinner for half the family, and Sabine doesn't seem to care that much either. She has good ideas, but neither one of us (or Andrew, for that matter) can get up the energy to make it happen. I'm sure we won't end up with takeout -- she only has $40 left -- but it certainly won't be anything fancy for just the three of us.

Funny how yesterday it seemed like a good thing to lower the numbers, and today it seems like a challenge we don't want to meet.

I wonder what this means for our future days as empty nesters? Potato chips for dinner in front of the television?

Ah, the joys of summer camp!

And it isn't what you think! Now, I hear summer camp is a fabulous adventure -- I wouldn't know as I never actually went. (Mom, when you read this, I am not complaining, it is simply a fact that is relevant to this post!) Swimming, bugs, nature, camp food, hot nights sleeping in bunk beds; a right of passage. I am sure the girls I dropped off this afternoon for the weekend away will have a great time.

However . . .

Sabine could not be more delighted to have them out of her hair and not eating (or complaining about) her food choices! She now has four days of feeding a smaller number of people, and she gets to buy food with gluten for Tim. She'll eat it, too, but only if she moves fast. Tim is an easy customer, he is mostly interested in quantity, and Oreo cookies can still be had in a decent sized package for a way cheaper price than similar GF cookies. Linnea stretched her budget by baking, Sabine stretches hers with fairly inexpensive store bought cookies.

I am sure Caroline and Linnea are equally happy to have access to the food provided at their running camp. From experience, they know that it will be plentiful and frequent, with no labels on the bags saying, "Don't eat before Sunday!" What a change from the past few weeks.

I have to be honest, I'll miss the campers, but I won't be missing the complaints or the pitiful faces when the M&Ms are gone.

More Free Bagels

Free is good. Free bagels are filling for three of the four children. We like free. As July is a new month, Sabine got to take advantage of our free bagels for a year card, which helps out her breakfast and lunch menu, and keeps down the complaining.

At this point, Sabine has about $93 left, and didn't need to shop today. She has plans for a shopping trip on Friday ($5 rotisserie chickens), and may need to stop there tomorrow as well. Her meal plan looks better for the next few days, and she has laid out a list of bread starters that she needs me to make for her. Tonight I offered her tilapia from the freezer and kale from the garden, so we had a downright elegant meal. I can tell that it is harder for her to plan than it has been for the others. She is only 12, after all! I am doing a little bit more directing with her this week, but it seems to be going pretty well.

Based on yesterday's Facebook comments, it sounds like this project ranges from inspiring to intimidating. Some readers are rooting for Mom to keep going and add more rules, while other people are hoping for the kids to either be done or to get even more free rein than they already have. From "another week please" and "I vote for another circuit" to "I think they have learned their lesson," it seems that our fans have lots of opinions and suggestions. Since I am flying by the seat of my pants here, keep all the good ideas coming!

I can tell you, for sure, that we are doing another round. I always intended the first week to be an opportunity to make mistakes, and week two to be a chance to improve. I am not expecting any miracles, but I am expecting some vegetables.

Besides, if we get to August, someone will get another chance at the free bagels!

What? No potatoes?

Personality differences and quirks are certainly coming out during this project! It never occurred to me that since Sabine doesn't like potatoes, she might not buy potatoes. Huh. Imagine my surprise when I looked in the potato bin this afternoon to find it empty. What? No potatoes? We are never out of potatoes.

Enter the Sabine factor. She doesn't like potatoes. Eats them, doesn't complain, but not her favorite. It doesn't bug me, really. Since she is a Type 1 Diabetic, avoiding carbs is a good thing; one or two small boiled potatoes on her plate is far preferable to a giant pile of mashed. But . . . the rest of us eat potatoes. Often. Kind of a food group for us.

Not for her!

Mom: "Sabine? Did you buy potatoes?"

Sabine: "No. Why would I buy potatoes?"

Mom: "Because we don't have any."

Sabine: "Oh."

Mom: "So, what are we having for dinner with the chicken?"

Sabine: "I dunno."

Mom: "Tim, when Sabine gets home from babysitting, please take her to the store."

Tim: "Why do I have to do it?"

Mom: "Because I am not leaving this house again today!" (I'll spare you the long story about that!)

Crisis averted. Or not . . .

I thought Sabine would be home at 4:00, but instead she got home at 5:00. There is no way she could get home at 5:00, go to the store with her brother to buy the potatoes, come home and have them in the pot and cooked for dinner at 5:30. Never going to happen. This was one of those days that the timing of dinner was not negotiable, as my runners need to digest before the evening team workout, and I couldn't go get the potatoes myself because Sabine has the money. Plus, I wasn't leaving the house again today, remember?

So, tonight's Nearly Meal (a term we use to refer to a dinner that is nearly a meal, but is missing a major food group or is lacking in sufficient quantities to satisfy everyone) consisted of homemade chicken nuggets and beans. Tasty, and exciting to eat beans from the garden, but not quite a meal.

Well, at least we had a vegetable.

Not gonna lie, little nervous about this week!

Sabine is the last one to take her first turn at groceries. She is a delightful, very intelligent 12 year old, who has, unfortunately, been in a bit of a spacey phase for the past six months. While she did do some planning in the last week or so, and even looked at the coupons in the paper, when it came time to actually do her shopping today she had a few issues.

She forgot what the deals were. She forgot the coupons. She did have a list, but forgot to write down most of the items. She didn't think about lunch.

I will own a bit of mis-communication that prevented us from having bread for lunch -- Sabine wasn't clear on what she needed, but I didn't ask the right questions either. She seems to be taking the Tim track, where she has what is on the menu for today, and maybe tomorrow, but I think more trips to the store will be required to feed us on Wednesday.

Sabine is pretty tired this summer, and I know how much energy it takes to get the shopping done. I hope she can muddle through without too much strife, but I am hearing complaints already this afternoon. Her big advantage over her siblings is that two of them leave for camp on Thursday, so she only has to stretch the budget for four people at the end of the week. Bonus! The garden is also starting to produce, in the next few days we will have beans to serve for dinner.

A vegetable. A summertime miracle. And she bought me some things to make a salad. On second thought, maybe we will be fine!

Okay, kids, let's talk about lunch!

Lunch. The downfall of my shoppers.

Caroline: "Hey, Linnea, what is there for lunch?"
Linnea: "Ummmm, there's banana bread."
Caroline: "Banana bread? Who do you think you are talking to!" (Caroline does not care for bananas, at all!)
Linnea: "Ummmm, there's a couple of hamburger buns . . ."

Caroline is eating a bowl of cereal.

Linnea: "Mom? I don't have any food for people for lunch."
Mom: "I know."
Linnea: "I guess I'll have to get on my bike and go get something . . ."
Mom: "Like what?"
Linnea: "I don't knowwwwww!"

I saw this coming a couple of days ago, as people seemed to be grazing around lunchtime, instead of eating real food. Then yesterday, Linnea decided (at noon) to make tortillas for pizzas, using red sauce we had in the fridge and the last of the cheese. Nearly two hours later, we had lunch. Today, there isn't much available. Tomorrow will be a problem!

It seems that my years of making quality lunches when they were toddlers and during the summers of their elementary and middle school years has spoiled these children. I don't think they realize that lunch for a family, seven days a week, takes a considerable amount of food. We can easily use up a loaf of bread, a half pound of lunchmeat, cheese, several apples, a bag of chips and a half gallon of milk if we all have a healthy balanced meal. Even with other options, like peanut butter, or cheesy chips with chicken, or tortilla pizzas, lunch takes food and the time to put it together.

In the first three weeks, my lunch grazers have not been satisfied with what is available, and then end up eating too much of what would otherwise be snacks for several days. No wonder Caroline and Linnea are labeling things!

When we have our mid-project discussion at the end of next week, lunch choices will definitely be on the menu!

And Mom has a meltdown . . .

Well, it was bound to happen sometime. I know you've all been waiting for it, and I'm a bit surprised it didn't happen sooner. In the perfect storm of life, lots of factors came together today to cause me to lose it, including those things that shorten a mom's temper before she even gets a chance to deal with the children. I blame it on several nights of terrible sleep (I do not function well when my sleep gets interrupted!), but I'm going out on a limb here to suggest that it might have just a little something to do with whining. Whining children. Who I would call whining teens, but the maturity level was a little suspect today.

To begin with, Linnea has these big baking plans, but her life is not making it possible for her to do everything she wants to get done. She is also a perfectionist, who starts in on a recipe and proceeds to check and double check each step. With me. Even when I am involved with something else. So this afternoon she had a short amount of time, a lot of tasks, a lot of questions and a messy kitchen. Which got messier. Which would be fine, if it got cleaned up. It didn't.

Then, Sabine came home to discover that, "All the pretzels are gone? Again?" There were tears. Neither Linnea nor Sabine put their best foot forward when dealing with that crisis. There was bickering. And whining.

I  might have told them to stop speaking. Forever. Especially to each other.

Finally, I figured out that in order to have our usual family dinner, we would have to eat at 4:30 (never going to happen) or 7:30. Okay, leaving Tim out of family dinner (when you're gone for 4 hours over dinnertime, really, what am I supposed to do?), we can eat at 5:30. Perfect. Except . . . Caroline can't eat dairy before running. "Baked mac&cheese? I can't eat that and then do a hill workout!" So, 7:30 it is.

And, guess who's cooking? That would be me.

Somewhere between Sabine's tears; Linnea's 101 questions about measuring spoons; Caroline hoping to avoid kitchen clean-up, running and having a good attitude; and Tim needing the car (and directions, "can you Mapquest it, Mom?") Mom lost it.

Today, this project is hard. This life is hard. Parenting is hard. And I didn't put my best foot forward. As Mr. Slinger says in the picture book Lily's Purple Plastic Purse, "Today was a difficult day. Tomorrow will be better." I hope he's right!

Oh, and remember Linnea's double checking of her recipes and asking me all the questions? Guess who didn't double check her recipe and forgot to add the lemon juice to her lemon poppyseed bread?

Yeah. That would also be me.

The Gluten Free Shopper Stretches Her Budget

As you have figured out by now, we eat gluten free in our house, not by choice, as two of us have Celiac disease. This week's shopper, Linnea, and I were diagnosed about five years ago, and it did not take long to figure out that trying to keep a partially GF kitchen, making separate meals for two out of six people, was never going to work. So, with very few exceptions (free bagels), gluten does not enter the kitchen.

Gluten free food is expensive, and much of it does not taste great. To make matters worse, I grew up in a family of bakers (my parents own a B&B), so the difference between homemade baked goods and breads with gluten and the store bought items without gluten is incredible to me. About a year or so after our diagnosis, I came across a blog called Gluten Free on a Shoestring which has allowed me to embrace GF baking that tastes really good. I have all the related cookbooks and the blog is the first page I visit after checking my email in the mornings; it has truly changed our lives.

So, back to Linnea. With her now $28, she needs to stretch her budget as much as possible, and really wants to keep the complaining to a minimum. She is the child in the family who most likes to bake, and her schedule has breads, cookies and other snacks on her to do list every day. So far, I have put together two bread starters at her request, she has frozen cookie dough balls ready for baking at anytime, a batch of protein bars in the fridge, and the ingredients for many other items. She has big plans!

Naturally, there is a catch. Plans on paper never quite work out in reality . . .

If Linnea could spend all day in the kitchen baking, everything would be fine. If she could sleep as late as she wanted each day and be totally rested, everything would be fine. If she didn't run, roller ski and babysit daily, everything would be fine. If she had no friends, everything would be fine.

Everything is not fine.

Linnea is discovering, as we adults all know, that having a life gets in the way of plans. I can hear her muttering about what to make for snacks and desserts, and I watch as the time ticks away in her day, and she starts to mutter even more about how she needs to get this done or that made. I am walking a fine line between wanting her to do this project her way and making sure she does not overwhelm herself with the stress of her plans needing some flexibility. Flexibility is not Linnea's strong suit!

Today was not a good day for her to bake, but tomorrow should be better. I plan to jump in there and give her a hand, partly to keep her from getting out of control, but also because, let's be honest, I love cookies.

Things are going pretty well . . . for a Tuesday!

The only shopping done today was purchasing ground beef for the 4th of July burgers later in the week. As I am extremely picky about our ground beef, this required a stop at an out of the way co-op (again chauffeured by Tim) and a precious $6.00. Linnea has a lot of food from yesterday's extravaganza of grocery buying, but her nerves seem to be suffering a bit. There has been a lot of muttering:

"I should have bought bigger potatoes"
"I didn't make enough food"
"People are going to be hungry"
"Nobody likes it."

The dinner menu was loaded baked potatoes (Tim served these, too, why didn't I think of that?), and was absolutely delicious, enough food, and well received by her target audience. Not only that, it even included all the food groups. Go, broccoli!

I have noticed that Linnea is extremely tired. While she hasn't had any verbal meltdowns -- yet -- she is probably thinking constantly about doing a good job and is wearing out her brain. Each time she gets asked about future meals, she starts answering the question by talking through her entire plan.

"We're going to have pasta, with Alfredo, and peas, did I buy the peas? I did. Is there enough cream? Mom? Did you say there is enough? There is? Okay. And baguettes. Mom. You need to make the dough for that. On Wednesday. Can you make it Wednesday? Okay."

So, a much smoother Tuesday than we have had, but I think we are living with a duck right now. Smooth on the surface, paddling like crazy underneath!