They've all gone -- but for how long?

 After a complicated multi-week travel extravaganza, three of the college students are safely ensconsed on campus. The fourth one is remote learning from her private room at the grandparent's farm for an additional three weeks, until moving in at school in mid-September.

The whole process took two and a half weeks, two cars, about 4,500 miles of driving, one mail in Covid test, one pharmacy Covid test, two on-campus Covid tests, two 14-day serious quarantines, one 14-day self-isolation, one 48-hour campus quarantine, three safety pledges, two New York State travel forms, numerous health questionnaires, and many wristbands. I think Caroline is still wearing one. Still to come, another 500 miles of driving, 14 more days of self-isolation, one safety pledge, at least one more on-campus Covid test, and probably a couple more wristbands.

Rumor has it that unruly students have been sent home from campus for the semester -- mostly freshmen -- but that campus administrators have been effusive in their thanks to students who are following the rules. Hopefully, they all settle in and get to stay.

The Villanova portable chairs are out in full force.

We are trying to lower the levels of parental anxiety here in our empty nest (!) but the specter of imminent return hangs over us. Since that would theoretically involve a few thousand more miles of driving, and very unhappy children, we keep all our fingers and toes crossed that it doesn't happen.

I do get the feeling that while Grammy is as hopeful as the rest of us that Sabine gets to campus as scheduled in a few weeks, she is also secretly delighted to watch over Sabine's shoulder during the Zoom lectures. And I definitely heard, "Oh, the Early Crusades? These books look wonderful, can I read them?" If Sabine had to stay there a little longer, I just don't think Grammy would mind!

Sabine would mind, though.

Keep crossing all those fingers and toes, won't you?

Rabbit Trivia

 Tim -- "Time for today's trivia . . . oh, this will be fun . . . Rabbits are known to . . ."

Linnea -- "ACK!! RABBITS?!? I don't want to hear this question!!"

Tim -- "Linnea, be quiet. Rabbits are known to express happiness by jumping in the air and turning around, sometimes turning a full 180 degrees. What is this adorable behavior called?"

Linnea -- "Adorable behavior? It doesn't say that. You put that in just to annoy me!"

Tim -- "I did not!! That is what it says!"

Linnea -- "Humpf."

Tim -- "So, any ideas?"

Bunny Bopping? Mad Hatter? No idea . . .

Linnea -- "I refuse to guess, since I don't accept the premise of the question."

Apparently, if rabbits did engage in this adorable behavior (which, per Linnea, is an impossibility, since they are not adorable), it would be called a Binky. 

We decided not to show Linnea any Rabbit Binky videos. Which are adorable. Shh . . . don't tell . . .

The Saga of the Sunflowers

One of the early features of this pandemic, remote learning, and lockdown was an across the board interest in home gardening. Whether to relieve personal boredom, occupy children, save on the grocery bill, or simply because we have more unstructured time, people have flocked to gardening this spring and summer. I grew up with gardening -- and when I say "gardening," I mean large plot in the backyard, much larger community garden plot requiring frequent after dinner and weekend visits, plus other produce by the bushel from the farmers market, leading to an enormous freezer full of fruit and veg and shelves of canned goods. I never had to worry about BPA lined cans, since pretty much everything I ate came from a Mason jar! My mother and my aunt once had a summer project where they took over the empty plot next door and raised 2,000 strawberry plants; that's the kind of gardening history I come from. 

Not surprisingly, I've always had at least an herb bed and a few tomato plants, even in the years when having young children kept me from real gardening. In the past ten years, I've expanded to raised beds, with some years more successful than others -- but always a plethora of green beans and fantastic sunflowers. Depending on the summer, I've had enough green beans from my little city plot to freeze, and sunflowers that attracted butterflies and goldfinches galore. Oddly, I can't seem to grow zucchini, which makes me feel like I'm not a "real" gardener, no matter my other levels of success.

One of the consequences of my upbringing in the garden -- daily tasks of planting, thinning, weeding, watering, harvesting, plus corn husking, cherry pitting, bean snapping, and apple coring -- was that I didn't put a whole lot of pressure on my own children to help. While they all know a weed from a bean plant, and how to shovel dirt, no one really exhibited a great interest in the garden. Until now.

Our Linnea needs to fill her time, so as not to drive herself (us) crazy. She is a hard worker, and has done landscape work in the past, along with various other jobs. Come April this year, already bored at home, we hear this:

"I'm so excited about gardening this year!! We have all these great beds, and we've done it before, and you love gardening, Mom! It's going to be great! I have it all planned out. Now, where do you get plants? Do you use seeds? When can we start? Isn't this awesome? I'm so excited!"

"It's a little early to plant in Minnesota, but you can start getting the beds ready."

"Too early to plant? Really? Why? What do you mean by get the beds ready? Can we plant soon? I want to get started!"

"Not before Mother's Day, Memorial Day is better."

"What?!?!?"

Honestly, why is April too early to plant in MN? Did she not grow up here?

"Okay, Mom, here's the list, how do we get this stuff?"

"I think you'll need to do curbside pickup -- send an email with your list, they will call you."

Later . . .

"And I'd like two basil plants. . . you're out of basil? Spinach seeds? No?  What about cucumber plants? No? Maybe next week? Sunflower Seeds? Okay, I'll take the one pack . . ."

"Mom! They don't have ANYTHING!"

"You know, I've heard everyone is gardening . . ."

"Yeah, that's great, but we ALWAYS garden!! We should be able to get our stuff! At least we'll for sure get the sunflower seeds, plus Grammy gave me her seeds for giant sunflowers, I'm going to put those all along the back fence. This is going to be so fun!"

A couple of weeks later, with plenty of help from the family -- everyone was bored after all -- the gardens were planted (closer to Mother's Day than Memorial Day, because, Linnea) and the seedling watch began.

"Are the sunflowers up yet? Did you look? I'll go look! No, not yet."

"What about today? Any seedlings? No? Sigh."

"MOM!!! Sunflowers!! Come look!! This is so great!! Look,there's one there, and two there, and the giant sunflowers are up in the back, too! I'm so excited! Grammy says they grow fast, they'll be a foot tall in a month!"

The next day. . .

"Huh. I thought there was a seedling there. And there. Where did they go? There are a few more popping up, but some are missing."

"Hmm . . . well, Linnea, I think something ate them."

"What? Who would eat my sunflowers?"

"The rabbits."

"I don't think so. They are not getting my sunflowers."

Right.

Give her credit, over the next six weeks, Linnea replanted the front yard variety pack of sunflower seeds twice, and the back yard giant sunflowers three times. She fixed fencing, covered seedlings with cups overnight, covered seedlings with cups during the day, chased rabbits, looked up rabbit repellent recipes, stood over those sunflowers like a sentinel, to no avail. The rabbits have won. Year after year, we have enjoyed our garden filled with sunflowers. This year, not one sunflower survived the wildlife. Linnea is crushed, and spiteful towards rabbits. 

Last week . . .

"Hey, Linnea, I think there is a cat in the back yard, stalking a rabbit. Want to watch and see what happens?"

"You better believe I want to watch!! That cat better get that rabbit! I want to see it bite off its head!!" (Spiteful? Vengeful?)

"There is goes . . . is that cat going to get the rabbit?"

Nope. Rabbit wins that round.

By the way . . . they ate most of my green beans, too. Sigh.

Thinking Outside the Box

"Each student will be provided with a portable chair to facilitate moving classes outside when feasible." -- Villanova University COVID-19 Health and Safety Plan

Admittedly, there isn't much to smile about these days. The image of a few thousand college students zipping around campus with their matching navy blue Villanova University camp chairs, ready to convene outdoors at a moment's notice has provided a rare note of levity to our lives. Tim, who enjoys a bit of quirky, is delighted about his portable chair -- can't wait to see a picture, hopes it is sturdy enough to last well into the future, plans to bring it out to sit by the campfire with his own kids someday. He went so far as to consider sending a message to the university president, suggesting the the person who came up with the portable chair idea should receive a large and immediate raise.

There are pictures floating around Facebook of 1918 pandemic outdoor classrooms of elementary students, so the idea isn't new. But, students today are of much less hearty stock, and perhaps lack a willingness to both be outside in cooler temperatures and to carry around the extra weight of a chair. Tim, however, is ready to bundle up and enjoy the fresh air and sunshine right through the winter. To be fair, he did attend nature based preschool in Minnesota, where half the time was spent outside every single day. It's all about layering!

We aren't the only ones excited about the chair. Apparently, the Villanova Portable Chair has its own Instagram. Really.

They Might go Back to College . . .

We are looking forward to welcoming students back to campus as scheduled in the fall.

Freshman in the Honors Program move in date, August 16th.

The University is paying close attention to state guidelines.

The University has convened a task force.

Your room assigment is . . .

Orientation will now be held virtually.

Decisions about the University Fall Semester will be made by June 30 . . .

July 1 . . .

After New York State provides additional guidelines . . .

July 15 . . . 

Please fill out this additional online form regarding university housing options.

Marshall Hall will now be the designated quarantine building, please be aware that your room assignment has changed.

Students willing to opt out of their housing contract, click here.

Financial Aid awards will be communicated by July 2 . . .

July 15 . . .

Before your first bill is due . . .

After we determine what funds are available . . .

Honors Program orientation has been canceled.

Kirk Douglas Hall will now be the designated quarantine building, please be aware that your room assignment has changed.

Your move in date range is August 14-16

August 20-22

August 23-25

Please sign up for a move in slot.

Your move in slot will be assigned to you.

If you need to change your move in time, please do so as soon as possible.

Changes to move in times will not be permitted.

All students must take a COVID-19 test 5-7 days prior to arriving on campus, and provide results on the student portal.

A COVID-19 test will be mailed to your home, please take it immediately and provide your results.

All students will be tested upon arrival.

No students will be tested unless showing symptoms or have had a known exposure.

Please consider getting a COVID-19 test before arriving on campus.

Based on current state guidelines, students will now be tested upon arrival.

The University will provide quarantine facilities for all students.

Quarantine facilities will provided, at a charge of $100 per day.

The University will provide all students with one reusable mask.

Two reusable masks.

All the masks students need.

The University will not be able to provide masks.

Please bring enough cloth masks for at least a week.

Student workers can wear their own masks.

Student workers cannot wear their own masks.

Please purchase a clear mask for your American Sign Language class.

Minnesota is now on the New York State 14 day quarantine list.

Minnesota has been removed from the New York State 14 day quarantine list.

Your new room assignment is . . .

You will receive your new room assignment on July 20.

Please fill out a housing form on July 20, then your new room will be assigned.

You will receive your new room assignment August 5.

All students must sign a campus pledge to follow all health guidelines.

We are confident that students will help us keep our community healthy.

We hope all students will follow the guidelines to protect our community.

Follow the guidelines to protect our community, or you will be asked to leave campus.

Your move in date is August 15 . . . August 22 . . . August 24 . . . we will notify you of your move in date on August 7.

No off campus visitors will be allowed.

One person can assist each student with move in.

You will be allowed one person to accompany you to campus, but they will not be allowed in the dormitory to assist with move in.

You may have two people help with your move in.

University students will only be allowed in their own dormitory.

Students may visit between dormitories after the first two weeks of the semester.

Please do not travel off campus.

Travel off campus is permitted within St. Lawrence County.

All fall breaks are canceled.

Students may remain on campus through the Thanksgiving break and finals.

All students must leave campus at Thanksgiving break, and complete the semester remotely.

The semester will end at Thanksgiving break.

Spring semester will begin on January 4 . . . January 11 . . . January 18 . . . January 25 . . .

Masks must be worn at all times when outside your room.

Masks can be removed for eating, as long as social distancing is maintained.

You can create a family unit in which you do not need to wear masks if social distancing is maintained.

Your family unit may include . .  .your roommate . . .your suitemates . . . single rooms sharing one bathroom . . . up to ten select individuals . . . your freshman seminar . . .

Please be aware that at any time during the semester, the University may be required to move to fully remote learning and all students will be asked to leave campus immediately.

If the University moves to fully remote learning, room and board will be partially refunded.

If the University moves to fully remote learning after 60% of the semester has been completed, there will be no refunds of room and board.

Decisions on refunds for room and board will be determined on a case by case basis.

Campus gatherings will be limited.

Clubs may continue to meet in small groups.

Parent's Weekend will be a series of exciting virtual events.

Homecoming will look different this year.

Reunion Weekend will be a series of exciting virtual events.

The rescheduled graduation ceremony for the Class of 2020 has been canceled.

Athletic events will look different this year.

No decision has been made about University athletics.

Intramural athletics have been canceled.

The University is committed to providing the same quality education you have come to expect, it will just look a little different.

We are looking forward to seeing students back on campus for another great year!

It's been a Minute

It's a good thing I'm not writing this blog for cash, huh? Things being what they were here in MN at the end of May and throughout June, it just felt terribly inappropriate to bring humor to all the trauma. Curfews, overheard helicopters, boarded up buildings, sadness and anger made it an overwhelming time. With all that comes a sense of inertia, and anxiety, and a feeling of dread that we will ever move forward with real change -- in ALL the areas that need it. Which is not to say we've been sitting here doing nothing, just that there hasn't been a strong spark for me personally to write about it. It is definitely a time to listen, learn, and absorb.

That being said, we're still here. All of us. The house has not gotten any bigger, and the temperature seems to get hotter every day, so we are feeling the pinch. If she could figure out a way to add air-conditioning, I'm pretty sure Caroline would pitch a tent in the yard, just to have her own space.

Not to worry, just because you weren't hearing about it, doesn't mean we don't have stories with which to entertain. Linnea still lives here, after all!

Blatherskite, continued

Linnea has a summer school class that started this week. Because her school is in New York State, the 9:00 AM start time is 8:00 AM here in Minnesota. Monday through Thursday, for six weeks. Linnea is not thrilled, mostly because she has decided, sensibly, that she needs to go to bed a bit earlier. As she shares a room with Caroline, who goes to bed later, we were able to get a full report of a recent conversation.

Linnea: "I got you something."

Caroline: "Oh, really? What did you get me?"

Linnea (exasperated): "I'm talking to Mom."

Caroline: "Oh. What did you get Mom?"

Linnea: "Ummmmmm . . . a flower."

Caroline: "Is it a pretty flower?"

Linnea: "Yesssss . . ."

Caroline: "What color is the flower? Is it purple?"

Linnea: "Ummmmm . . . I don't know?"

Caroline: "You don't know?"

Linnea (now wide awake): "Why are you talking to me?"

Blatherskite.

Calendar Trivia

Tim -- "Here is the next trivia question to ponder -- What is a blatherskite?"

Mom -- "Hmm . . . that ite ending suggests something geological to me"

Sabine -- "That's what I was thinking, rocks in caves, or something. Maybe a mold or growth."

Caroline -- "No, no no, here's what it is . . . some kind of disease where you talk too much. Like Linnea has!"

Linnea -- "Hey! How is it always pick on Linnea day?"

Dad -- "I was looking at blather, too, and thinking it might be talking too much."

Linnea -- "Thanks, Dad."

Dad -- "I didn't say anything about you!"

Linnea -- "Uh huh."

Mom -- "Well, what about looking at blather and kite? A giant mouth shaped kite that looks like it is talking when it is flying?"

Everyone -- "No. Definitely not that."

Mom -- "Well, I'm usually wrong, I'm just trying to be creative. I'm sticking with geology."

Sabine -- "Me, too."

Tim -- "It's probably something gross, like a weird wart."

24 hours later . . .

Sabine -- "Any more guesses for blatherskite? No? Okay, here is the answer . . . huh. Look at that."

Mom -- "Well? What is it?"

Sabine -- "Blatherskite: A person who talks too much, often without making sense."

Caroline (with fist pump) -- "YES!! I was totally right!!"

Mom -- "No, you said it was a disease."

Caroline -- "Whatever. I totally said it was Linnea."

Linnea -- "I hate you all."

Mom -- "Really?"

Linnea -- "Wellllllll . . . no . . . I do talk a lot . . . but I usually make sense!!"

Caroline -- "Not in your sleep . . ."

10 Influential Albums

Those of you on Facebook may have seen or participated in the listing of ten albums for ten days that influenced your life, musical growth, general outlook, or just have pretty album covers that you like. Being the musical people that we are, the Kralls had to jump on board. Since only three of us are on FB, and we could never wait ten days to see our lists, we just laid it all out at the dinner table last night.

Linnea: "Wait, I'm not ready!! Did I know we were doing this tonight?"
Mom: "I'm pretty sure I reminded you three times."
Linnea: "I was BUSY!" -- grabs a Post-it and begins to scribble frantically, while mumbling

Caroline: "You guys wrote yours down? Mine is just in my head! You can't just remember all ten?"

Tim: "I have five Honorable Mentions . . ."
Sabine: "FIVE?!? I thought we weren't allowed ANY! The list is limited to TEN!"

Sigh.

Without further ado . . .

Anneke's List (in no particular order)

Sesame Street's Grover Sings the Blues
Broadway Recording of Annie Get Your Gun (Ethel Merman)
Manheim Steamroller - A Fresh Aire Christmas
Air Supply - Greatest Hits
Clannad - Past Present
Great Performances - Romantic Favorites for Strings
Bette Midler - Bathhouse Betty
Grey's Anatomy Original Soundtrack Volume 3
Tracy Chapman - New Beginning
Mindy Smith - One Moment More

Andrew's List (by decade?)

Rush - Signals
Yes - Yessongs
Led Zeppelin - The Song Remains the Same
Van Morrison - Astral Weeks
Grateful Dead - Reckoning (live acoustic set)
Gordon Lightfoot - Gord's Gold
Bob Dylan - Blood on the Tracks
Beck - Sea Change
Ella Fitzgerald - Live in Berlin
Oasis - (What's the Story) Morning Glory

Tim's List (Ranked 10th to 1st, with Honorable Mentions. Five of them.)

Honorable Mention -- Celtic Tides, Jagged Little Pill, Reckless, Heartbreak Weather, Best of Daughtry

Real List
10. Linkin Park - Hybrid Theory
9. Taylor Swift - 1989
8. Mindy Smith - One Moment More
7. Creed - Greatest Hits
6. Oasis - Definitely Maybe
5. Nickelback - All the Right Reasons
4. Tracy Chapman - New Beginning
3. Nickelback - Dark Horse
2. Heart - Essential Heart
1. Paramore - RIOT!

Caroline's List (Earliest influence to current. Flawlessly listed outloud with no cheat sheet.)

Oasis - (What's the Story) Morning Glory
Beach Boys - Endless Summer
Taylor Swift - Fearless
The Beatles - Revolver
The Beatles - Abbey Road
Bruno Mars - Unorthodox Jukebox
Boyz II Men - II
Guardians of the Galaxy - Awesome Mix Volume 1
Five Seconds of Summer - Youngblood
Day 6 - The Book of Us: Entropy

Linnea's List (Written and modified at the dinner table, while listening to other lists, possibly adding albums as they were mentioned by others.)

Child's Collection of Songs
Celtic Tides
Peter Paul and Mary - Peter Paul and Mary
Simon and Garfunkel - Greatest Hits
Oasis - (What's the Story) Morning Glory
Jay Sean - All or Nothing
Vitamin String Quartet - Lady Gaga
Backstreet Boys - This is Us
Chopin - Nocturnes
Dvorak - New World Symphony

Sabine's List (After Tim's five Honorable Mentions, she felt compelled to add three herself!)

Honorable Mention -- Jagged Little Pill, Celtic Tides, Night Visions

Real List
Kenny Loggins - Return to Pooh Corner
Sara Barielles - Little Voice
dvsn - SEPT. 5TH
Marshall Crenshaw - Marshall Crenshaw
Mike Doughty - Haughty Melodic
Death Cab for Cutie - Plans
Maroon Five - Songs About Jane
Taylor Swift - Fearless
Nickelback - All the Right Reasons
Grey's Anatomy Original Soundtrack Volume 2

Tim and Sabine would like to note that they don't need to hear any complaints about Nickelback. They know that everybody hates Nickelback. They love Nickelback. Deal with it.

Please feel free to comment, agree or disagree (except for Nickelback, see above), and provide some of your own favorites.

Now What?

Over the weekend, the final papers and tests were submitted. Spring Semester 2020 is in the books!

Now what?

Summer jobs -- all on hold. Tim's awesome internship -- moved to summer 2021. Caroline's research will still happen here in St. Paul, but let's be honest, we don't see much of her during the day anyway. How different will it be to have her in her room doing research instead of watching YouTube? Linnea has big plans to train for another marathon, but with no set date for a race that will probably not be as intense as it could have been.

Swimming pools? No. Movie theaters? Probably not. Museums and the zoo? I don't think so. The Mall? Amusement Parks? The State Fair? Highly unlikely, and we wouldn't be able to go anyway.

Obviously, there are house and yard projects, but really, how often do you have to mow the lawn?

Once a week. Less if there is a heat wave.

This could get ugly real fast. I may have to teach them all to knit.

Sometimes, there is an Unnecessary Trip to the Grocery Store

We really do try to limit our grocery store visits. As mentioned before, the biggest challenge here on the daily is having and cooking enough food for six adults. Especially considering that three of these adults are used to college life, where snacks are plentiful and stored in a bin under their beds. And they haven't had to share. Apparently, a box of crackers lasts a lot longer when only one person is eating them!

After dinner the other night, the rumblings began . . .

"Is there any dessert? Didn't we just make brownies today?"
"Please! Those were gone by lunch!"
"I really want ice cream? Do we have any ice cream?"
"Nope. No room in the freezer for ice cream, remember?"
"Right. Boy. I really could use some ice cream."

"Hmm...how late is it? Is the grocery store still open?"
"Not much longer."
"Anyone want to go get ice cream with me?"
"I'll  go with you, but you know we really aren't supposed to . . ."
"I know! I know! But, ice cream!!"
"Well, if we're going, we should get more snacks, not just ice cream."
"Sure! Let's get all the snacks!"

"Mom, we're going to the store. Is there any food money?"
"Why are you going to the store? Do we need something?"
"We want ice cream! And all the snacks!"
"Well, then, no. If you want snacks, you can spend your own money."
"Huh. She says we have to spend our own money."
"Really? Why?"
"Because it is for snacks. And she obviously doesn't think we should go!"
"We shouldn't go. We know that."
"Well, we're going. Let's get it done, here's your mask."
"Fine. But I'm driving. And you're paying!"

"We're back! Here's the ice cream! What flavor do you want? We got chocolate or mint."
"Ooh, mint! What other snacks did you end up getting?"
"Other snacks? Are you crazy? We had to spend our own money!! You're lucky we got two flavors of ice cream!! We certainly didn't buy anything else!"

Shades of the past, when they were responsible for all the grocery shopping. I distinctly remember teens limiting snack purchases during that project because, "I'm not wasting MY grocery money on YOUR snacks!" Have they learned the value of a dollar? My work here might be done!

Probably not. But it's a start.

Why College Students Need to Go Back in the Fall

Obviously, if it isn't safe, the college students should ablsolutely stay home and continue remote learning. With four college students in this family beginning this fall, I am prepared for each school to have a different plan, which will have it own complications. We can continue our set-up in this house for quite awhile, and we will. None of that changes the fact that I really hope they go back to campus. Because . . . Finals.

I have discovered this week that college students need to be on campus for finals week. There is clearly a reason why I have encouraged them to go so far away for college. Finals week. The stress levels among the three college students are off the charts. They are so wound up that even I had a stress dream about taking a final in solidarity!

Linnea waffles between being convinced that she failed the finals she has already taken, and being certain there is no possible way she can pass the test coming up. It appears that she has tests only, and no papers, and I can't figure out which would be better. I am quite certain, however, that if she had to call me to worry about her finals, I would hear a lot fewer things like, "Do you think I failed?" or "What if I failed?" and "I'm sure I probably failed." Only because I would actually have the opportunity to not answer the phone, not because she wouldn't be calling! She would be far better served by being surrounded by her cohort of worriers than being here with us. Although, we will still love her in the end, even though she is driving us crazy . . .

Caroline appears to have mostly papers and some tests. As usual, we can't figure out when she actually does her work. Mostly, we hear, "Ugh! I don't want to write this paper!" and "I know I should be doing that paper." or "Maybe I'll wait and work on that paper later." When asked later how her paper is coming, we inevitably get this response, "That paper? Oh! That's finished, I turned it in!" I'm pretty sure she is a vampire, working diligently at night as the rest of us are sleeping. Which leads to high levels of cranky fatigue during the day . . .

Tim has been the biggest surprise. He seems very organized and scheduled -- which would come as quite the shock to his first grade teacher, who despaired of him ever having a tidy desk. It is comforting to realize that study skills and habits can be learned over time. However, he is exhibiting anxiety that is very unexpected. For some reason, he cleans the kitchen when he's anxious. More than once, he has been found muttering over the dishwasher as he reloads it, "Why would you put the bowls there?" and "Who loaded it this way?" He has also been seen loading the dishwasher on days other than his, because he can't stand looking at the mess in the kitchen. Even his sisters are noticing, Caroline just asked him if today was his dish day -- to which he responded immediately, "Yes!! This is why the kitchen looks fabulous!"

Hmm . . . maybe only Linnea and Caroline need to be on campus for finals week. Tim can stay here.

Things that Surprise Me

How long a standard bar of soap lasts. Dial bar soap, even with all this hand washing, does not get used up as fast as I thought it would.

How little trash we are generating. It seems like last summer when everyone was home, we constantly had more bags of trash each week then would fit in the trash can. Those of you who live in St. Paul will recognize that too many bags for the can is a big no-no here. So far, we have only had an extra bag one week, and were able to save that to put out the following week with no overflow. It appears that when you cook at home, and never shop for anything else but groceries, that there isn't as much trash. No shopping, no packaging to toss. Who knew?

How reasonably decent Andrew's hair looks without a haircut. Especially considering that he was a week from his next scheduled appointment when everything shut down. He is now at nearly three months since his last cut, and while shaggy around the edges, doesn't look bad at all. The greys are more noticable though . . .

How often someone says something in our house that is also a lyric from Hamilton. And how the statement is always followed by someone, or several someones, singing the next line. Every. Single. Time. Oddly, the second place winner in the accidental lyric contest are songs by Weird Al Yankovic. Which they also sing on cue. Because, we span the range of musical culture in our house.

How I notice the amount of toilet paper on the roll every time I go into either bathroom. We have plenty of toilet paper and even found a large package of our preferred brand last week. Which I bought, because six people live here. But still, I find the toilet paper thing very stressful. On the whole, I believe a person's TP use is a personal deal. As long as the little children never pulled a whole roll off at once and tried to flush it, I figured I could stay out of their toilet paper business. Now, I'm on high alert about TP use all the time. It is both annoying and unnecessary. By the way, somehow, as the mom, I am still the only one who changes the roll. Baffling.

How much useless triva Sabine knows. We have a daily triva calendar, which we answer at dinner every night. Unless it is something completely obscure, she always knows the answer. And she has a good correct answer rate on the obscure ones, too. How does she find out all this stuff, and how is she retaining so much information? After the usual accusations of cheating from her siblings, she'll say something like, "I remember hearing about that in 4th grade . . . at camp . . . when I read . . . in a dream . . on BuzzFeed . . ."

How it is nearly two months since Andrew picked up the college students, but I still wake up every day and feel like we are being pranked. Before I look at any news for the day, I always think that maybe this is all a dream, and we brought our kids home for nothing, and everyone else is laughing at us for being so ridiculous. Then I look at the news, and switch to thinking that the world is ending.

I mean, Murder Hornets? Really?

Someone Else Cooked!!

Someone else in this scenario means one of the children. Andrew does his fair share, mostly on weekends, and can at least be counted on for ideas during the week. The children? Not so much. When asked for meal ideas, there is a lot of hemming and hawing, I don't knows, and repeat suggestions -- usually involving pasta. Gluten free pasta is tough to find in the stores these days, and I've never been moved to make my own. The other frequent sugestion is takeout -- who's paying this food bill, anyway?

It has taken some time, and a lot of convincing, and possible a couple maternal tantrums, but there are finally some results in the dinner planning arena. Last week, Caroline showed me a list of potential meal ideas. Imagine my surprise when she said she had even looked up recipes!! The next few days involved some discussion about which one to make, when to do it, and whether we had the supplies. Finally, the selected day arrived . . .

"So, how long do you think this will take? When should I get started?"
"Did you read the recipe?"
"Right. It says 15 minutes total cooking time! That will be easy!"

Hmm . . . the dish was Spanish Rice with Chicken. This timeline seems suspicious, as rice does not cook in 15 minutes . . .

"I think you should look at the recipe again. What does it say about the rice?"
"The rice? Oh! It says leftover or already cooked rice."
Silence.
"Ugh. I have to cook that ahead then, don't I?"
"Yup."
"Shoot. I know, I'll make Dad do it!"
"You can't cook rice?"
"Well . . ."

"What time should we eat?"
"Your dad is working, Tim has a class, Linnea is taking a test at 6:00."
"So, 5:15? 5:30? 5:45?"
"Sure, one of those."
"Mom."

"Is it time to start cooking yet?"
"You could make the rice."
"There's probably enough time, I don't have to do it yet."

"Should I start cooking soon?"
"Did you make the rice?"
"Not yet."
"You could do that."

"Did you make the rice yet? You really need to do that."
"I don't really know how. Dad always makes the rice."
"You know, I can show you how to make rice."
"Oh! Good! Okay, you make the rice."
Honestly.

"Okay. Now, you cook the chicken while I cut up the vegetables."
"I'm helping with this part, too?"
"Yup!"

"I'm doubling the recipe. So, if it says one medium onion, I can just use two."
"Is that a question?"
"No, no, no, I'm using two onions."

"Cutting up onions always makes me cry."
"Cutting onions makes everyone cry."
"Hey, why is Caroline crying?"
"I'm cutting onions. It's so, so sad . . ."

"Hey, this looks good! Doesn't it look good? Do you think it will be good?"
"It looks delicious!"
"Nobody's going to like it."
"I'm sure they will like it."
"No, no, no, no one will eat it."

"Sabine! Why did you take such a small amount?"
"I'm not really that hungry."
"Yes, you are! You just don't like it!"
"I haven't even tried it!"
"She doesn't like it . . ."
"She's probably just not hungry."
"Yeah, right. She hates my cooking."

"Linnea isn't finishing hers."
"Linnea never finishes anything."
"She finishes her Mac & Cheese!"
"You're right. She never finishes anything I cook, either."
"That's fair. But she also probably doesn't like it."

"Oooh! Look, everybody!!"
"Look at what?"
"Tim!! He's having seconds!"
"He probably likes it."
"Do you think so, really?"
"Well, he's having a second full plate . . ."

"There's a lot left over. Nobody liked it."
"Everybody liked it, and leftovers are good. People will eat it tomorrow."
"I guess . . ."

"Phew. That was exhausting."

I'm sure it was. Welcome to my world. And, thanks for cooking, Caroline!

Sound Familiar?

"Is there anything to eat?"

"What's for dinner?"

"Can't she do it?"

"I have a Zoom meeting."

"And, there goes the Internet. Again."

"I'm tired of wearing a mask."

"Do I have to wear a mask if I'm just taking a walk?"

"I like the masks with ties!"

"I like an elastic mask, are they all dirty again?"

"Ugh, I hate when the ties clash with the mask part."

"What? The only clean one is pink? Yuck."

"Is there any dessert?"

"I was going to make brownies. How are we out of cocoa again?"

"Would someone watch a movie with me?"

"Everyone is busy, I guess I'll just do something by myself."

"I'm bored."

"If you're bored, you could . . ."

"I'm not that bored!"

"When is this going to be over?"

"I'd really like to see my friends."

"Do you think we'll go back to school in the fall?"

"Shh!! There is a Zoom meeting going on!"

"I wonder when we will . . ."

"Do you think we will ever . . ."

"I was really looking forward to  . . ."

"How is someone always in the bathroom?"

"Go outside and get some fresh air!"

"I don't feel like going outside."

"It's raining? Now I can't go outside!"

"MOM!!"

"Do we have any snacks?"

"Be quiet! I'm in class!"

"Why did you put a teddy bear in the window?"

"Mom has a Zoom meeting? Really? She has friends?"

"I hate playing games."

"Who finished the puzzle?"

"Do you think they will extend the lockdown?"

"This house is too small!"

"But I did it last time!"

"I'm tired."

Sigh.

And then there is Tim

"Can someone take out the trash?"
Tim: "Sure."

"I need some help bringing in the groceries."
Tim: "I'll help!"

"Anyone feel like playing Yahtzee?"
Tim: "I'll play!"

"How are your classes going?"
Tim: "Just fine, all my work is finished"

"Finals coming up next week?"
Tim: "Yup! I have my paper writing schedule all planned out."

"Can someone run the vacuum?"
Tim: "I will."

"Anyone want to watch a movie with me?"
Tim: "Yup!"

"I'm going for a walk, do you want to come?
Tim: "Of course!"

"I'm having trouble with this calculus problem, can someone help me?"
Tim: "I'll take a look at it with you."

Tim: "Hey, guys, listen to this funny story!"

Tim: "You've got to watch this great video with me."

Tim: "Don't worry about emptying the dishwasher everyday, I don't mind doing it."

Tim: "Can I help you?"

Tim: "I'm going to go play Just Dance, come join me!"

"Mom, why is Tim your favorite?"
"Isn't Tim everyone's favorite?"
"Yeah, you're right."

Caroline is not Complicated

Our Caroline is by nature an introvert. She is still recovering, filling her introvert cup so to speak, from her semester abroad last fall. In the interest of being a good guest and wringing all the opportunity out of her stay in Prague, she socialized, traveled, ate, drank, and was merry for more than three months. She's exhausted, and also very grateful she went abroad last fall and not this spring. Pure luck that it happened that way.

So, here she is at home, prevented from the need to socialize, with her family who loves her and understands her quirks. It is going well for her! I give you, a day in the life of Caroline . . .

9:00 (or 10:00) -- Wake up

10:00 (maybe 11:00) -- Procure her curbside pick-up of her morning cold press. She feels the need to continuing supporting the coffee shop where she has worked for four years, in hopes that they will still be around to give her a few hours of work in the not too distant future. Right now, she is letting those more in need take all the shifts. We, on the other hand, are simply glad her daily cold press is still an option. Caroline without her coffee is less delightful than one would hope.

The rest of the day until dinnertime -- No one really knows . . . we see her, sitting at a computer, wearing headphones, sometimes laughing, sometimes looking annoyed. Lectures? Reading? YouTube videos? Writing papers? It is a mystery. We don't bother her, she doesn't bother us.

6:00 -- Joins the family for dinner. Eats, talks, laughs, is generally good humored.

7:00 -- Some more family time, maybe, if we don't expect her to play a board game.

The rest of the evening -- No one really knows . . . she insists that she is not online, trading secret family recipes for toilet paper, but we aren't so sure . . .

Living with Linnea in a Lockdown

Before I throw Linnea under the bus in this post, please be assured that our whole family knows how lucky we are to have her in our lives. She is kind, funny, generous, and loving. As a preschooler, she was the first of the children in the family to start giving gifts to everyone for Christmas -- surprisingly thoughtful and lovely handmade creations, usually out of notebook paper, tape and one or two colors of crayon. As a teenager and first year college student, she has been the one in her friend group to notice when others are sad or in need. She took stationary and sheets of stamps to college with her to write letters back home to all the people who have supported her over the years. Not so much to share her activities and brag, but because, "who doesn't want to get a real letter in the mail?"

She is also anxious, obsessive, tenacious, and a little bit crazy. We try to combine the funny with the anxious, since it is usually better to laugh than cry, right?

My parents live about 1,100 mile from us, in remote northern Pennsylvania. And by remote, I mean on top of a mountain, accessed by roads that routinely become impassable in the winter. It is about an hour to the nearest airport, which is itself so small that it only has six gates, and the person who prints your boarding pass on one side of TSA is also the person who scans it to board the plane on the other. It is, especially with the frequent stops neccessary when traveling with small children, a strong 18 hour drive for us to get there. And we always drive. During the elementary and middle school years, we broke up the trip over two days, but when the littles could be counted on (usually) to sleep in the car, we drove straight through. I tell you this to set the stage for understanding what it is to live with Linnea in these interesting times.

When Linnea was about four, we headed out of town for one of our trips to visit the grandparents, leaving at around 4:00 in the afternoon to drive through the night and arrive in time for lunch. The children were settled in with their bags of toys, books, and snacks; the family travel rules had been clearly laid out (it should surprise no one that I had very strict rules for traveling in a car when they were young, and that we never traveled with any videos. I'm so mean); the first music CD was in the player. We made one brief stop to drop off books at the library, less than two miles from our house. And then, as we pulled out of the library parking lot, we hear this from the very back of the minivan:

"Are we almost there yet?"

Less than two miles of 1,100. About five minutes out of 18 hours. If there was ever a time that a mother thought about turning the car around, this was the moment. And so it began. Our sweet Linnea asked if we were there yet over and over. And over. And over. When she was particularly gloomy, she would begin to chant, "I'm soooo hungry, I can't do it. I'm soooo hungry, I can't do it. I'm soooo hungry, I can't do it." See? You're already annoyed!

This, then, is lockdown with Linnea . . .

"How much longer do we have to do this?"
"When can I see Cain?" (Cain is the delightful boyfriend of three years.)
"Governor Walz is stupid."
"Governor Walz is not stupid, he is doing an excellent job."
"Yeah, yeah, I know. But when will this be over?"
"I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE!"
"You know, we are trying to stay healthy for Sabine."
"I KNOW!! But, when can I see Cain?"
"Do you think the stay at home order will get extended?"
"I don't know, it might."
"NOOOOO!!! I can't do this anymore!!"
"What are people doing right now Anyone want to watch a show?"
"Anyone? Dad? Sabine? Want to hang out with me?"
"WHY IS EVERYONE ALWAYS BUSY??"
"They are working, why aren't you?"
"I don't WANT TO!!"
"When is this going to be over?"
"I should bake something. Should I bake something? What should I bake?"
"I don't know what to bake, what do people want?"
"I'll definitely bake something, but probably later."
"Is there any dessert?"
"NOOOO!! I forgot to bake something!!"
"So, this is going to be over soon, right?"

Seriously. I am going to turn this car around.

Let's Talk About Sabine

Today (Sunday, April 19) is Sabine's 18th birthday. You can imagine how this is going. The cake is baked and frosted (thanks, Tim!), there are presents, and her takeout meal of choice will be procured shortly. The highlight of her day was a visit by her two dear friends from school this morning. Proper social distancing occurred in the yard, after the two girls drove over separately -- even though the three house are basically in a straight line with one exactly halfway between. In normal circumstances, the girls would never be so frivolous as to drive two cars! Sabine would like it to be noted that she does not like the term "social distancing," preferring instead to say "personal distancing." I think she feels social distancing is an oxymoron, if you are being social, how are you also being distant?

We say things frequently in our house, like "I know it is tough, but we are all going through this," and "everybody is missing something they wanted to do," or "at least we like each other enough to tolerate being together." But, let's be real. Sabine is the one taking the biggest hit in our house.

Two months ago, Sabine and I were in New York City (yup, the epicenter, across the street from the law firm where the first case worked). She was there for an interview with the Royal College of Surgeons in Ireland. Two weeks later, we were in D.C., for an info session for the University of Edinburgh in Scotland. She has been accepted and paid a deposit for University of Mary Washington in Virginia, as part of their Honors Program. It is a great program, however, with potential options overseas, it was more of a backup plan than a first choice. But, one month ago, the world exploded, and with it, all the the second semester senior dreams and plans of our girl.

Being a senior stinks right now, high school or college. No prom, no final spring break trips, no graduation walks or parties, no jobs to be found, no certainty about the future. To make it worse for Sabine, her acceptances overseas were all based on tests she needs to take in May, either Advanced Placement or International Baccalaureate. IB tests? Cancelled. (She isn't super fussed about not getting to take the tests, but she did really want to get some results -- it's a paradox!) Will American students be welcome abroad? Would we want her to go? So far, each week, Mary Washington moves another piece of orientation online; hardly the exciting introduction we would hope for to get her enthusiastic about her domestic option!

So, the list of negatives far outweighs the positives right now, but it is still her birthday. We're all together, even though we shouldn't be. She has a college to attend in some way in the fall, even if it isn't her first choice. Everyone in our house remains healthy -- a big plus with Sabine's status as one of the most vulnerable. And, there is cake.

Cake always outweighs the negatives, right?

Entertaining Moments While Zoom Learning

Linnea passes Caroline a note: "I really have to pee!"

Caroline writes back: "Do you want me to sit there and cover for you?"

Linnea: "That's what I was thinking . . ."

Caroline gets up from her chair: "You need me to take notes?"

Linnea pulls off her headphones: "Here, pay attention!"

Caroline puts on the headphones and sits down.

Linnea starts to run out of the room.

Mom: "Did you turn off the camera?"

Linnea: "Nah. They'll never notice. We look just alike."

Runs up to the bathroom. Someone is in it. Runs down to the bathroom.

Caroline looks studiously at the computer, takes notes.

Linnea returns, takes the headphones, sits down.

Caroline: "That was terrifying!! She called on someone!! I was like, SH*T!!"

Crisis averted.

I can't believe this finally happened

According to my Facebook history, it wasn't until January 28, 2014, that I purchased any toy guns for my children. It happened then because of our week long break from school for cold temperatures, when I had to get them outside doing something resembling anything. Since I also managed to avoid purchasing cellphones for them until they each turned 15, it should surprise no one that we have never owned a video game system. In fact, the closest thing they ever had was each owning one Webkin, and playing some games on the computer using those.

As of last Friday, we own a Nintendo Switch.

I cannot believe this. And it is all Andrew's fault. In fact, he should be writing this! Even the children, bless their hearts, don't think it was necessary -- although they are enjoying using it.

"Alright, what four colors of controllers should we get?"
"It comes with blue and red."
"Red? Red isn't an assigned color for anyone in this family!"
"Well, that's what it comes with! We can choose the other two."
"Pink and green? Purple and yellow?"
"Yellow? Who would want yellow?
"Grammy?" (Grammy never met a yellow she didn't like)
"Grammy is NOT going to be playing Nintendo with us!"
"Purple!! I want purple!"
"Yeah, but no one wants yellow, pink and green make more sense."
"I hate pink."
"Okay, so pink and green it is."
"Grrr."

"Mom, you have to make a profile."
"Why? I doubt I'm going to be playing this much."
"Because you HAVE to!"
"I really don't think I'm going to be playing this . . ."
"Oh come on, you will totally be playing!"
"Uh huh. Right."

"Time for Just Dance! All four of us at once!"
"People, attach your safety straps!!"
"Move the couch. Is there enough room for all of us?"
"No, but who can we leave out? Make it work, it will be fine."
"Okay, but I don't have enough space!"

In our tiny basement family room, about eight feet square . . .

"How did Sabine get the high score again?"
"Because she keeps whacking me! I would totally win if she would stop whacking me!"

"Linnea, what are you doing? That is NOT the move!"
"How is Linnea just flailing around and still getting a perfect?"

"What? Tim won?? How is that possible? He can't dance!"
"You know, Tim just got an A in his semster of dance in college."
"He did? How?"

"Dad wants to try? Oh, boy . . ."
"Dad!! Use the safety strap!! What are you doing? No, you can't have the controller in your left hand, we set it up for right hand!"
"I'm left-handed."
"Whatever. Too bad."

"You know, I'm a good dancer. I still say I would win if Sabine would stop whacking me."
"Who says you're a good dancer?"
"I am! I've got moves with my hips!"
"Your hips? What hips? You are a literal popsicle stick!"
"Hey!!"

"Um, guys? It's 11:30. You know, that's my bed over there. That I'm not sleeping in."
"It's 11:30? How did that happen? Sorry, Mom."
"Yeah, sorry, Mom! So, one more song?"
"One more? But I still get to pick one more, too! So, two more!!"
"It's late, Mom wants to go to bed!!"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah, so two more, then."

Guess they like it.

Escape Room -- The Board Game

A couple years ago, we had our first experience at an Escape Room. Each Christmas, we do some activity for the family as a gift -- very trendy! Mostly, it is live theater (Hamilton in Chicago this past year, AMAZING!), but we try to come up with something new and different occasionally. Thus, the Escape Room. I will confess that I was super excited about it, until about three minutes after we got locked into the first room, when I became convinced that we would never solve any of the clues and we'd be the first group ever to enter the room and never be seen again. I can be dramatic.

Being excellent puzzlers, we did manage to solve the mystery within the allotted time, with much hilarity and entertaining examples of previously unknown individual personality traits. Naturally, we had planned to go back and do another one, but busy schedules prevailed and we haven't had another opportunity. Now, here we are, all the free time but all the social distancing. What is a family of puzzlers to do?

Never fear, friends. Escape Room -- the Board Game. I am hardly surprised that we own it (thanks, Uncle Phil), more shocked that we have not yet played it. Apparently, even when the fun doesn't involve leaving the house, it can be tough to come together for an hour, and we would never want to leave anyone out. Caroline also takes some convincing, as anything with the words "board game" in the title is to be avoided at all costs. Nevertheless, our free time must be filled at least some evenings and here we are.

"I am reading the rules, I am the only calm one."
"What's this machine thing? Should I take it apart? It doesn't work!"
"Do NOT take it apart! Does it have a battery?"
"I don't know! How would I know?"
"Open the battery case."
"Yay! I DO get to take it apart!"
"What is this for? What do we do with these?"
"You people are too noisy, I am going outside to read the rules. DON'T TOUCH ANYTHING!!"

"I will be in charge of the hint cards."
"We need a hint, when do we get another hint?"
"Not for five more minutes, keep trying."
"Here's the next hint . . . oh, you already figured that out!"
"What? Give us another hint, then!"
"Nope! Five more minutes."
"Do we get a hint?"
"I read it to you five minutes ago. No one was listening."

"It can't be a Z U, there isn't one of those!"
"Look, a Z U!"
"Oh."

"3-5 11-6 7-5 14-8, 12 is next, how do we know the pair? Let's see, let me think."
"Six"
"What? How do you know?"
"I know"
"All you did was look at the list!"
"Yup. It's six."

"You gave us the wrong key!!"
"I did not!! You said the dot on the side!"
"Yeah, the other side!"
"It's symetrical!"
"You're looking at it upside down, you dork!"
"I'm not a dork!"
"Not you, she's a dork!"
"HEY!!"

"It's a parallelogram."
"What are you talking about, there's no parallelogram!"
"The next hint says, the picture is a parallelogram."
"I TOLD YOU!!"
"Yeah, we know, it's a parallelogram."
"What do you mean WE? I'm the only one who saw the parallelogram!"

"The last one is a two."
"Are you sure? Where do you see a two?"
"How do you not see a two?"

"We only have a minute left, put in the keys!!"
"If we're wrong, we'll get penalized! We'll run out of time! We'll lose!"
"If we're wrong, we lose anyway! PUT IN THE KEYS!!"
"Don't screw it up!!"

Whistles and Bells!! We win, with a minute to spare!

"What happens if we lose?"
"We're trapped in here forever, duh."
"We're trapped in here forever anyway!!"
"Good point."

Living With Statisticians

In case you need an update, Tim Krall began college as a math major, took a semester off and went back the following fall to declare his new major of English (Creative Writing) and Theater. Never saw that coming. Lest you think he left math because he didn't like it, wasn't good at it, or has lost his lifelong interest in numbers, brackets, and statistics, let me assure you that is not the case. Most of the random facts coming out of his mouth are numbers related, and we hear a lot of them. When Caroline headed off to college, she was also focused on numbers, and has only a couple more classes left before completing her majors in Statistics and Government. To say she is in her element with the daily briefings would be an understatement.

Thanks to Tim's fascination with Worldometer, we get twice daily updates about the numbers and rankings, both US and worldwide. To keep it interesting, he refers to countries or states rising and falling in the "power rankings," or the upcoming "matchup"  between places with close case counts. He likes to provide details about numbers as related to population size, just in case we have all forgotten how percentages work. He also likes to pronounce it "world-oh-meeter" instead of "world-om-ehter." Which is making Sabine crazy. I'm sure he is doing it just to mess with her.

Caroline is much more interested in charts and graphs from daily updates. Yesterday, during the Gov. Walz briefing, she was thoroughly annoyed with the coverage.

"Ugh! Where's the graph? He is pointing to a graph!"
"You know, they probably only have one camera."
"They should have a split screen!!"

And then:

"Oh, look at that!  See that line? See how flat it is? This is so awesome."
"I do love a good Confidence Interval..."
"Watch this, are you watching this? See how the whole pink box moves over? Isn't that great?"
"I just love this guy..."

And this morning, randomly:

"The best part about the graphs yesterday? That thing where the line showed ICU beds now, then the line for a 24 hour ramp up, then the line for a 72 hour ramp up. That was so awesome!!"

Obviously, we all know none of this is awesome. But, if my kids can find a way to be interested and engaged in the process of getting through the dark days, I think I'll take it.

Tuesday Performances

Andrew has been working every day from his spot in the basement. In case you are looking for a new location yourself, I can recommend using an egress window as an excellent standing desk. Good natural light, appropriate height, room for a laptop and a cup of coffee. While I am the manager of most daily activities, Andrew has absolutely been doing his part -- he has a dishwashing day, comes up with dinner ideas, ventures out to the grocery store. He also came up with one of our weekly family activities. He calls it Tuesday Performances.

A piece of paper, posted on the refrigerator titled "Tuesday Performances" appeared not long after the college students arrived home. It said, "3/24 -- Dad will recite Colridge's Kubla Khan from memory."

Mom -- "What is this Tuesday performance thing?"

Dad -- "I think we need something to prepare for each week. No pressure, but I'll put something together."

Mom -- "Okay . . . I guess. Do I have to do something? I have to do something eventually, don't I?"

Dad -- "No pressure. But, yes. You do."

3/24, at a gathering after dinner in the living room:

"What is this thing? Dad's going to recite poetry? From memory? Where's the poem? Get me the book, I'm going to follow along and make sure he doesn't screw it up!"

"You know, at least he is putting himself out there."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Give me the book."

He did very well. Two mistakes. He was cheered and mocked simultaneously, as only one's children can do.

3/31:

"Charades? What are these charades? Dad's doing that? After the Tiger Woods Pictionary debaucle?" (Andrew once could not get the clue of Tiger Woods in pictionary from a lovely drawing of a tiger among trees. He has never lived it down.)

"Caroline and Linnea are doing a song together? This will be great!"

(Apparently, Caroline and Linnea specifically chose a song loathed by their brother, and laughed hysterically throughout. Mom was confused.)

"A surprise performance by Sabine? Oh, boy..."
(A dramatic reading of Yertle the Turtle, well done.)

4/7:

"More charades? By Linnea? What is she doing? Are you driving a car? She's a terrible driver! Driving Miss Daisy! Wait, are you a ballerina now? What happened to the car? Now she's running. Why is she running? And twirling again? Baby Fish Mouth!! What? Chasing a tornado? Where did you get this idea?"

(She Googled "Ideas for Charades." Resourceful, that one)

" Mom is playing the piano? Huh."

(Mom did play the piano. My piano teacher may have rolled over in her grave!)

"Dad's doing another dramatic reading? What is it this time? We have to guess? How are we supposed to do that?"

(It was Lincoln's 2nd Inaugural. Mom got it after the first few lines, the kids didn't get it until it actually mentioned the Civil War. Slackers.)

Nothing on the list yet for 4/14 . . . but maybe a monologue, staring Tim? As a woman from 1934?

I thought we were done with all this

We are not homeschooling. Forget the fact that three of the kids are in college, and are responsible for themselves, I am not the right personality for homeschooling. I didn't like teaching school when I got paid to do it, I certainly don't want to do it now. I was never the homework helper mom, even when they were young. After all, if you are in 4th grade this year, don't you still remember 3rd grade math from last year? You can help the current 3rd grader with any questions. This is why I have four children!

Where we do excel is providing the tools and structure that helps people succeed. Everyone has a desk space, we are managing the power cords and the internet access. Do you need a printer that has both paper and ink? We've got you covered! A calculator, ACT prep book, science fair tri-fold board? All available as needed throughout all the schooling years. Even as they headed off to college, a simple text question would get them information, or something ordered on Amazon, or a phone call to talk through a new adulting task.

They are all doing a great job managing their own educations right now. Although, to be fair, Sabine is really just getting started, she could potentially need more guidance structure encouragement bossing around than the rest of them. I have high hopes, though, especially now that the IB Diploma testing has been canceled.

Mom -- "Hey, Sabine, looks like they have canceled IB testing."
Sabine -- "This is the best day of my life."

So, why do I feel like a slacker right now? And like I should be more engaged and involved? There are articles galore about homeschooling, and structure, and families setting up a Zoom meeting for the three and five year olds. And pictures of coloring desks, and iPads, and nature walks, and seed starters. If I have never done these things, why do I feel pressure to suddenly do them now?

Of course, I have actually been doing these things all along. Haven't we all? Wasn't the grocery shopping summer a homeschooling activity? And their ability to do laundry, and clean a bathroom, and weed the garden, and set up and run their own 3-day garage sale? They all know how to swim. And sing. And spell (well, maybe not Caroline...). And drive a car. And talk to grown-ups. And cook, laugh, read, love. We are all going to be fine. They are going to be fine. You are going to be fine.

And I might even help out a little more than I did when they were younger, since we are all adapting to a new normal.  After all, I never expected to have this conversation:

Tim -- "Looks like I have to do a video of my monologue."
Mom -- "That sounds interesting, do you need help with that?"
Tim -- "Well . . . I'm supposed to have some suggestion of a costume . . ."
Mom -- "Really? You? Who stopped dressing up for Halloween when you were eight?"
Tim -- "I know, right?"
Mom -- "So what do you have to dress up as?"
Tim -- "A woman, from 1934."

Huh. Didn't see that coming.

Musical Interludes

We had a quiet moment yesterday afternoon, four of us in the living room with knitting, Sudoku puzzles, and a little homework.

Then Caroline started singing. First just some tuneless humming, then some recognizable tunes, then words. While Tim is the improv comedy expert in our house, Caroline was definitely holding her own with virus appropriate lyrics. It was entertaining to listen to her come up with the next line, often causing a chuckle from the others when the words were particularly good -- or particularly bad. Tim gave it a shot at one point, only to be told:

"Hey! No changing songs in the middle!"
"But you just changed tunes?"
"I was done that one."
"How do you know you are done?"
"Because it's my song."

And then. Hallelujah. You know the one. Starting out the way it does, with Caroline's creative words in place of the real lyrics, not sure where it would end up. And suddenly, I hear humming harmony coming in from the desk where Linnea was working. And no laughing anymore.

And finally . . .

"Social Distancing" sung by Caroline alone the first time. But on the repeat, Tim and Linnea join in, perfectly in tune, adding their voices to hers. Three verses by Caroline, with humming harmony, and the "social distancing" chorus sung by all three of them. It was sad, and funny, and lovely all at the same time.

They stopped singing after that. Because, it was their song. And they knew it was done.

The Things You Learn at Home While Distance Learning

Obviously, I'm not doing Distance Learning. I'm not really doing much of anything around here except staying out of the way. But I sure am learning things about my family!

I have decided there is a reason we encourage our children to grow up and move away. College students in particular hit a steep learning curve when they go from high school classes, Schoology accounts with assignment lists that parents can access, and the ability to fall back on a ride from dad or an early wake up call from mom, to total personal responsibility. And by total responsibility, I might mean freedom to do anything you want whenever you want without any silly input from your parents -- who think they know better, but, really "life is just so much different now, you just don't understand!" All three of our college students attend schools in New York and Pennsylvania, all over 1,000 miles away. Sometimes, it seems crazy that we supported and even hoped for that distance, but I now know it was for the best.

Observing my children's study habits is making me crazy.

8 AM -- Everybody is sleeping
9 AM -- "I've got lots of reading to do"
10 AM -- "I think I'll take a walk and maybe get some coffee"
11 AM -- "I'll just watch a couple YouTube videos before I get started"
12 PM -- Lunch!
1 PM -- "Boy, I've got a lot to do"
2 PM -- "Ten hours until that assignment is due"
3 PM -- "Ugh. I just don't feel like doing this work, I need a break"
4 PM -- Naptime!
5 PM -- "Ugh. This is so stupid"
6 PM -- Dinner!
7 PM -- "Let's watch a movie"
8 PM (from the curious parents) "Did you get all your work done?" "Mooommmm" (eye roll)
9 PM -- "I'm so tired"
10 PM -- "Guess I'd better start those readings I need to do for tomorrow"
11 PM -- "Ugh. I just can't do this right now, I'm going to bed"

Curious parents -- "What about that stuff that was due at midnight tonight?"

College student -- "What? The stuff due tonight? I totally did that already!"

What? When?

Does Mom Ever Get to Watch Netflix?

We live in a small house. We didn't mean to still be in a small house, aka our starter home, at this point in our lives. It just sort of happened, and as people headed off to college it didn't make much sense to upsize to have space for winter and summer breaks and rattle around the rest of the year. Hindsight is always 2020 . . .

Andrew has worked from home on Fridays since last summer, he has all the equipment and security he needs, so switching to fulltime at home work hasn't been an issue. It did take a few days for him to settle into his permanent home location, but he is now restricted to the basement. He spends literally all day on phone calls and Skype, and apparently the rest of us tend toward disruptive and noisy. I guess that doesn't work for him. He's the only one actually earning money right now, so he rates the quietest space. Conveniently, the laundry is also down there, so with good planning pretty much anyone can start a load and get Andrew to move it to the dryer. Not so conveniently, our only television is located in Andrew's workspace. And, is attached to the wall.

Upstairs, we have three bedrooms for four children. The problems have already started! Tim is fine, has his own room, a desk, a chair, and plenty of well-located outlets. Sabine also has her own room, which her sisters complain about endlessly. Mind you, they have no interest in sharing with her -- she is pretty messy -- but they don't hesitate to notice the unfairness of the youngest sister having her own space! Linnea and Caroline currently share, but only have one desk. Everyone has headphones and earbuds, but who wants to have on headphones while on a video chat? Apparently, not these kids!

Downstairs, we have a dining room table and a desk, neither of which is anywhere near an outlet, so cords to computers are stretching everywhere. If we get through this pandemic without a computer hitting the ground after a cord gets tripped over, I will be amazed! I can't exactly keep track of who prefers working downstairs to upstairs, because everytime I look, a different person is sitting in a different place, including the couch. Sometimes using a computer, sometimes on a phone, but occasionally using actual pen and paper. Who knew?

Even with everyone settled into a location, there are still issues to resolve.

"Shh!! Dad's on a call!"
"I need to Zoom at 9:00."
"But, I need to Zoom at 9:30, will you be done?"
"That's three people, no one else can stream then."
"But I need to download my video lecture!!"
"But I need to Skype with my TA!!"
"What are you doing on the computer? Are you streaming?"
"Who is using the microwave?!?! You are killing the internet!!"
"I'm just trying to warm up my coffee!"
"You CANNOT use the microwave without checking with us!!"
"Ugh. Am I ever going to get to finish watching that thing on YouTube?"
"Who unplugged my charger? My phone is going to die!"
"Where is my charger?"
"Whose charger is this?"
"I need to use that outlet!"
"Why are you working down here?"
"She's in my room, on Zoom, not on mute."
"Ugh. Why can't you be on mute? You're so disruptive!"
"Where are my headphones?"
"My headphones aren't working, can I use yours?"

Where is Mom in all this? Not on Netflix, that's for sure! All those awesome shows available for streaming right now? No way, not enough bandwith for that! I can Zoom, but really only in the evenings, unless it is really important and I get permission for a limited time. But definitely not in a room with the door closed, because all those spaces are taken. "What could you possibly need to talk to people about on a video anyway, Mom??" (Insert eyeroll)

And where did I type this blog post? Sitting on the bottom step in the living room, next to an outlet. Because someone unplugged my charger . . .

Who really qualifies for Stimulus?

Since the Krall kids are numbers people, they have been watching the discussions of the Stimulus Package with some interest. On the one hand, the designation for who gets what seems fairly clear. On the other hand, there appears to be a long list of ways people don't qualify, might qualify, might get something more than nothing but not everything, might get it in three weeks, or maybe three months, will get it but probably don't need it, won't get it but definitely do need it -- the possibilities are endless.

In our household, we think Tim and Caroline will get checks without any further action on their part. They have both filed taxes for 2018 and 2019, with direct deposit, and are over 18. While we are fully supporting our college students at home during this time, those checks will replace the income lost by them when they left campus. All of our kids have campus jobs through the Federal Work Study program. Not only did they lose that employment by leaving campus, their jobs in the restaurant industry at home are not exactly begging them to take shifts. So, no income from working, potential stimulus checks, looks like a zero sum game for them.

Sabine qualifies for nothing. She is 17, and while she will file taxes for 2019, with direct deposit, there is nothing she can do about her age. 17 years old is in the no man's land of no stimulus, as the dependent checks only go up to age 16. I'm not precisely sure what message we are sending to the 17 year olds of the country -- you are too old for money, but also too young for money? Is age 17 the year where it costs your parents nothing to support you? Because I have some receipts tucked away in my files that would suggest otherwise . . .

Now for Linnea . . . you knew there had to be an entertaining story ahead involving her, didn't you?

Linnea did not file taxes last year, but was to file for 2019, and is over 18. In fact, as far as we knew, she had already filed, since we heard rumors of when it was on her list of tasks. A couple of days ago, as the stimulus details began to emerge, we had this conversation:

Mom: "Linnea, you filed your 2019 taxes, right?"
Linnea: "NOOOO!! Was I supposed to have done that already? I didn't do it, and you aren't helping me! I don't know what to do!!
Mom: "I thought you said you were going to get Caroline to help you when she visited in February? Or over spring break? I mean, I can answer questions, but we don't help Tim and Caroline do their taxes."
Linnea: "NOOO!! I haven't done it! Is it too late?" (March 26)
Mom: "Of course it's not too late, but you need to get it done, in case you qualify for the stimulus check by doing it. Plus, April 15th is coming up." (I know there is an extension, but really, Linnea can't get it done in the regular timeframe? Of course she can!)
Linnea: "How do I do this? I need help! Can someone help me this weekend?"
Dad: "We'll get Tim and Caroline to help you. You'll use Turbo Tax, it will be easy."
Linnea: "Are you sure it will be easy? Turbo Tax is on the computer? They will help me?"
Mom and Dad: Sigh.

Saturday morning, Linnea has her computer, her tax documents, and the help of both her older siblings. Her parents are in the next room, because, trust me, we did not want to miss this!

Linnea: "Okay, I'm ready. Are you ready? What do I do?"
Tim: "You know you are lucky, you get to use Turbo Tax. The first time I did mine, I used paper forms."
L: "Are paper forms better? Should I do that? How do I find Turbo Tax?"
Caroline: "Google"
L: "Okay, I found it, what do I do now?"
C (feel free to insert an eye roll with any and all statements at any time): "Click start"
L: "Okay, I did that. Now what?"
T: "Read the questions and answer them."
L: "Wait!! It wants my social security number!! I can't type that into the computer, it isn't safe!!"
C: "Well, you can't pay your taxes without putting it in, so . . . "
L: "But what if someone steals my identity? This is bad, this is very bad."
T: "It's going to be fine, type it in."
L: "Okaaayyyyy . . . "

I'll spare you every detail of the personal information section. You can let your imagination run wild. Then we come to the real questions . . .

L (reading out loud): "Are you a veteran? No, right?"
T: "Right"
L: "Are you a citizen? Yes. Did someone else claim you as a dependent? No? Yes? DAD!!!! Have you ever blah, blah, blah, filed under a different name blah, blah blah, committed a crime, blah blah blah, claimed something about something, blah, blah, blah. I DON'T UNDERSTAND ANY OF THIS!!"
C: "You know, if you don't understand the question, the answer is probably no."
L: "Really? Are you sure?"
C: "I'm sure."
L: "Are you blind?"
C: "Did you just read that question?"
L: "Yes"
C: "Then, no. You are not blind."
L: "Phew."

There was much continued angst about entering things like email addresses and bank numbers, because Linnea is sure her identity is about to be stolen. Then, quite a bit of exasperation from her siblings about what constitues a very strong password. And, this . . .

T: "Okay, you've done Federal, now you have to add Minnesota and New York."
L: "WHAT?? I have to do this THREE times?"
T: "Well, no, it is the same thing, just a little extra info for the state return."
L: Sigh.
C: "State is pretty easy, I can help with New York."
L: "Was any of your income earned in Yonkers? Yonkers? What is Yonkers?"
C: "If you don't know what it is, the answer is no. There is something weird about local taxes in Yonkers."
L: "But where is it? And how do you know this? I'll never know everything I need to know about all this stuff!"
C: "You are doing fine."
L: "It's BROKEN! It says I owe 43 dollars!!!"
T: "Yeah, dude."

Finally, the questions in the preparer section . . .

Linnea: "Are you filling this out for Linnea who has died?"
Caroline: "No. But I will be . . ."

It's Puzzle Competition Day!!

We love puzzles here. One of Tim's favorite toys as a toddler was a wooden state puzzle, which he called the "Texas," since that was the biggest piece. Everything is bigger in Texas! As these people are excessively competitive, they have, of course, developed a puzzle competition. Originally done with a set of four 300 piece American Girl puzzles, we have moved on to 750 piece Thomas Kincaid Disney ones. While we now own about ten different options, the puzzle competition involves the first four we purchased. The current tournament is in Round 3. Each person has to do each puzzle, and there is some complicated math to determine who will actually be the winner. Place plus time plus degree of difficulty plus some ratio developed by Tim? I'm confused by the whole thing myself! Round 3 was initially scheduled for Memorial Weekend, when everyone was going to be home between college and summer jobs. Imagine the excitement when it got moved up to today!

After two rounds, the current standings seem to be Caroline in first, or maybe Linnea? That puts Tim in third, but maybe he's in second? Sabine is last. She is usually last. She has a good attitude about it, which is pretty amazing, but the whole game seems to be set up against her. Back in the day, her American Girl puzzle was definitely the hardest. And she was the youngest and least experienced puzzler. And she usually had to do hers sitting on the floor because we didn't have enough table surfaces. Add in a little chronic pain, and a really strange -- to the rest of us -- puzzle doing method, she is in a tough spot. And in Round 3? She has to do Tangled.

No one wants to do Tangled. Love the movie, and Rapunzel is my personal favorite fairytale, but the puzzle? So, so hard. A dark sky, a dark lake, and a plethora of yellow lanterns. The contest started by drawing the puzzle choices out of a hat.

Tim -- " Nooooooo!! I got Tangled! Nooo!! I have no chance!" Then later, as he psyched himself up -- "Alright, this is good. Tangled first. Get it out of the way. I can pick up my ranking with Beauty and the Beast later. No problem!"

Caroline -- "It doesn't matter which puzzle I get. I will win. I am the best puzzler."

Linnea -- "No! I'm the best! I will win. Caroline is not the best. And I will prove it by being first every round. Caroline will not beat me. Ever. What? I have to do Tangled in Round 2? Nooo!!! I will not win that round! I have to winnnn!!!!"

Sabine -- "I'm going to come in last. Give me Tangled next. It doesn't matter. I will finish last. Let's get it over with."

60 minutes in, at the first break? Sabine has the border done. That's it. Poor kid.

House Rules vs. Real Rules

7 Day a Week Rules

House Rule #1 -- Parents will be respected.
Real Rule #1 -- Parents will be acknowledged as being parents, with some level of older, wiser insights leading to occasional sensible requests, thoughts, plans or ideas that may or may not be accepted as reasonable by the adult age children. Also, the parents own the house and cars, and have funds available for any and all purchases, so if you want anything, maybe they do actually get respected. Most of the time.

House Rule #2 -- Projects will be completed if requested.
Real Rule #2 -- Sure. If someone else can't be convinced to do it first. Or, if I remember. And don't have something else pressing to do first. I guess.

House Rule #3 -- Meals will be prepared if requested.
Real Rule #3 -- Wait, cook enough for everyone? Like, right now?

House Rule #4 -- All rooms in house will be kept at a reasonable level of cleanliness.
Real Rule #4 -- In all fairness, have you been to our house? It was never meant for this many adults to be in it all the time, trying to work, relax and eat with no way to escape. It's nuts. Plus, Sabine is used to having a whole floor to herself, and she does not lean towards tidiness!

House Rule #5 -- Dish/kitchen clean up assigned by day
Real Rule #5 -- Not too bad so far, except 6 people for 7 days . . . "Team" dish day is a struggle. See above under Real Rule#2.

Monday thru Friday Rules

House Rule #1 -- All family members will appear on the first floor by 9:00 AM
Real Rule #1 -- All family members will appear on the first floor by 9:30 PM. Plus, why Friday? We don't have class Fridays, really it is Monday thru Thursday. But, yeah, okay, I guess. What? 9:00 AM? Not 9:30 PM? Really? Are you sure?

House Rule #2 -- All family members will shower and dress as per normal
Real Rule #2 -- You know that thing in college dorms where 27 people share 3 shower stalls, and one drain is always clogged so it is really 2 shower stalls? It turns out that shower per normal happens at some strange times . ..

House Rule #3 -- Family Breakfast sometime between 9 and 10, Family Lunch around noon, Family Dinner sometime after 5.
Real Rule #3 -- Are you kidding? These people eat! Right on schedule!

There are things more important than toilet paper

When staying at home with a family of six adults, toilet paper has its place in the list of necessities. It is not, however, the only necessity! In no particular order, here are a few things that must be rationed, shared, increased, created, fixed, found, or encouraged  . . .

Faster internet

A good vacuum cleaner

Dishwasher detergent

Positive attitudes

M & Ms (see the 2014 blog entries!)

A bigger house

Bathrooms 

A plentiful yarn stash



Then there are the things we don't really need . . .

More than one car

Bickering

Things you hear in my house

"Who finished the puzzle already? I only got to put in a few pieces!!"

"I'm picking the next puzzle!"

"Who picked that puzzle?"

"I hate that puzzle!"

"How is that puzzle already finished? We just started it!"

"Did you wash your hands?"

"But she never has to . . . do the dishes, laundry, trash, vacuum, set the table, go to the store . . ."

"Use headphones!"

"It's my turn to pick the movie!"

"No one wants to watch my movie!"

"Why do I have to sit on the floor every time we watch a movie?"

"Wash your hands"

"We are out of . . ."

"Put it on the list"

"But, I got up early to go to the grocery store last time!!"

"Shh! Dad's on a call!"

"Dad is always on a call"

"Is Dad on a call?"

"MOM!!"

" YES! I washed my hands!!"

"Woohoo, I won at Solitaire!"

"How much longer do you think we'll be stuck here?"

"I got another update from Villanova...St. Lawrence...Rochester...SPPS..."

"Did you just come inside? Wash your hands!"

There is Good News . . .

My kids all know how to grocery shop!

I wonder how they learned? 😂